So you want to take that lovely honey out, and really show her a good time. You've been building up the courage to finally ask her out, and she says yes!

Your plan is flawless. First greet her at her house with flowers, take her to a lovely Italian restaurant (her choice, of course), and then for a cocktail at the nearest lounge.

After a few drinks, you two happily drive to her place and you wait for the invitation inside. Instead, you get a hug, with her joyously saying "We HAVE to do this again sometime, Rob!"

You smile, and nod, and go back to your car, horny and dejected. At least she wants to go out again, right?

OF COURSE she wants to go out again! You just gave her a 5 star dinner and spent 70 bucks on her! Now you've set the precedent that you're going to be taking her out again, and again, very lavishly. She also knows that if she shows you just enough interest, you'll keep taking her out.

Here's the deal. Pretend you're not a desperate, horny bastard, and you meet a girl who is very nice and pleasant to be around, but somehow does not give you an erection. Maybe she looks plain. Maybe she's 40 pounds overweight.

This girl proceeds to take you out to Hooters for wings, invites you over for UFC Pay Per Views (paid by her of course), and whenever she picks you up to take you out, she brings a six pack of beer to leave in your fridge.

Are you EVER going to tell her "You seem nice, but I don't think it's ever going to happen between us,"?

Of course not!

You might even give in and kiss her a little bit every now and then, to keep her going. Then when she starts to take her shirt off, and you notice the rolls and cellulite, you might say "Umm... this is going a bit fast for me. I'm old fashioned. Can I have another beer?"

That's how you look to a girl who's not into you when you are spending a lot of money on her. You're a pleasant dinner companion, and a meal ticket. She may even really think you're a nice, fun guy. But you ain't getting any.

Of course, there is a place for taking a girl out nicely, but it's not the first couple dates. What you want is to let her experience you for you, and not be overwhelmed by the food, drink, and atmosphere that you take her to.

She needs to decide that she likes hanging out with you while doing things that are somewhat, well, uneventful. If you can keep her stimulated and happy during a walk in the park, she knows she can have fun with you. And no $70 credit card bill!

Here are some great, easy first dates

* Coffee
* Ice Cream
* Jamba Juice
* Walk in the Park
* Walk on the Beach (Daytime only, don't be cheesy)
* Local Street Fair
* Cocktail or Beer at a Dive Bar

These things can easily be combined to make a super date. The more places you hit on a date, the more comfortable she feels around you. The best part is, if you live near any of these things, you don't even need to drive! You can just have her meet at your place, get ice cream, then go back into your place to put the moves on.

Now tell me that doesn't beat Italian cuisine. :-)

Dan Ravers is a columnist for the direct yet zany, helpful yet hilarious dating advice site http://www.datefunzone.com. Plenty of articles and quizzes for both guys and girls await your visit.