A Few Words on Philosophizing!
Once I was in a restaurant and I ordered some lunch. I was with a small group of people around this table having a little lunch. It wasn't …you know, six, seven people around this table….I don't know, eight people…nine… about forty people having lunch…a small group of people.
With my lunch I ordered a glass of milk. Now I like milk. You know how I feel about buttermilk, but milk I like. Milk I adore. I like fresh, cold milk. If it's warm…yuck! I can taste it, but I don't like it.
Anyway the milk came. And I was about to drink it when I noticed that floating at the top of the milk was the littlest, tiniest black speck. And I am here to tell you that nothing in this world mattered but that little black speck. It became the most important thing in my life for the next few minutes. First of all I wasn't gonna let that damn thing down in me, I'll tell you! You know, who knows these days what it was? It could have been a solid chunk of strontium 90, you know. Or maybe a large typhoid colony. Anyway I didn't want to swallow it.
Now I have seen black specks before - I am a sophisticated man, I've lived - and I'm sure you've seen them too. You can see them any place. However, I think you spot them mostly in sugar bowls. Once in a while you catch one lurking about in a bowl of flower. Oatmeal is loaded with black specks; I think oatmeal is mostly black specks, if you want to know the truth. But that's neither here nor there…. Now the thing that bothered me about this black speck was that I didn't know where it came from. That's what bothered me. I knew where the milk came from - and that bothered me too, you know, but at least I knew where it came from. So I decided to get the black speck out of the milk.
Do you know how hard that is to do? These black specks are smart as hell. They can smell a spoon a mile off! The minute you pick up the spoon they start running around the glass, don't they? You pick them up and they jump out… and you've got to be very careful or they get wise and they dive for the bottom, and you have to sit there like a fool for it to float up back again.
Now there is one thing you can do: if you just take the tip of your finger and you touch the speck very gently, it'll stick to your finger along with a large blob of milk - and you have it out. But you know when you are with a group of people you don't want to put your finger in your milk. You know, some wise guy is bound to say, "Say! How come you're putting your finger in your milk?" What are you going to say, "I'm trying to get a black speck out?" You know you have no answer.
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