Five Rules for Negotiating Like A Pro


by Mary Greenwood - Date: 2007-01-31 - Word Count: 592 Share This!

Negotiating online is different from communicating in person. First of all, it is not done in real time. Communicating online is by definition a delayed process. One party sends an email and then waits for a response. Since you cannot see or hear the other person, you are getting all your cues from the online message. Because you are typing and thinking at the same time, it is easy to make mistakes which only get noticed after you have already sent it. Here are five rules that apply to negotiating via email.

1) Set the tone.
When you are sending your messages by email, that is the only thing the other side sees. The other party cannot see your face or look at your body language. Your emails will set the tone. Do not write everything in CAPITAL LETTERS. That is like shouting and is considered to be very rude.  Be careful with expressions like LOL (laughing out loud), smiley faces, funny noises or anything else that might be amusing with your friends, but not professional when setting the tone for a negotiation

 2) Say what you want.
This is particularly appropriate for online negotiation because you are dealing only with emails. You cannot hesitate as you might in person. You must be clear and direct so there are no misunderstandings. Emails can sound cold to the reader so be careful not to be too clinical. However, trying to be comical can fall flat on a written page.  Remember the other side cannot see your body language to get cues. The recipient can also be offended if the email looks carelessly written because of all the grammar and spelling errors. It sets a tone that you don’t care and are not professional.

3) Everyone needs an editor.
If you have read some of your emails after the fact, you know that it is easy to make typing mistakes. You can create more problems for yourself if you are dealing with damage control because of an email full of mistakes.However, they are not easily spotted when you do your first proofread. Once you have sent your email, it may be too late. It is a good idea to put an email away and review it the next day for errors before sending it out. You will be surprised what you might find today that you could not see yesterday!
 
4) Don’t rush or be too slow.
The pace of an online negotiation is very different from being in the same room. Don’t be too slow by not answering the emails in a timely manner. If one party takes too long to answer an email, the other party can lose interest altogether. On the other hand, you don’t want the other party to think you are waiting at your computer for their next message. Even if you feel you are on a roll, put some distance in time between messages. You do not want to appear too eager so the other party may think that you are desperate to settle.

5) Keep track of your paperwork.

Keeping track of the paperwork is very important when negotiating online. In a face to face negotiation, the other side can quickly forget exactly what was said. With emails, either party can go back and see exactly what was written.  Be sure to read previous emails to know what the agreement is before responding.  If you don’t, the other side will, and you may be embarrassed if they have to correct you.

If you follow these Rules, you will be negotiating online like a Pro.



Mary Greenwood, J.D., LL.M: Author, Arbitrator, Mediator, How to Negotiate like a Pro, 41 Rules for Resolving Disputes
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