When the Words We Use Hurt Someone Else-Insults
IN OTHER WORDS, INSULTS HURT!!!
As much as they hurt there are loads of resources on the World Wide Web that give you instructions on how to create and deliver insults. I am not providing them here because it is an insult to encourage this kind of verbal abuse.
I am not a psychologist but every time I witness someone casting an insult I am watching a person who has been hurt himself or herself. They are often striking back. I have been a victim as well as victimizer at some points in my life.
Sometimes folks just don't want to or too tired to find another way of speaking to someone. When there is disappointment in a mate's behavior the person may, instead of pointing out the behavior, attempt to attack the person.
Recently someone shared with me this insult. "Your are a poor excuse for a man." This was said by a woman feeling frustrated with her husbands recent behavior. I am sure he had a comeback like, "You are just like your mother" Ouch!
IS THERE EVER ANY TRUTH?
Insults often have some truth in them, that's why they hurt so much. For example, there was a woman who shared her insecurity about the size of her thighs with her husband during a revealing and trusting moment.
Days later, when he was angry at her threat to leave the relationship, he lashed out in a loud voice, "That's right run away, THUNDER THIGHS!"
SNEAKY INSULTS
The most dangerous kind of insults is the sneaky ones. Those are insults that are disguised by good body language and tone of voice. Imagine the seemingly happy couple in a public place. He looks at her, smiles and in a surgery laced voice insults her. He uses information only the two of them know about and cut her in shreds. Yet, for all appearance sake no one can ever say they witnessed a deadly form of verbal abuse. The bottom line is your manager, friend or family member can have a smile on their face while stabbing you in the chest!
Insults are a common form of verbal abuse that makes us angry and often wounded for life.
All Rights Reserved, Rosemary Horner, 2007
Related Tags: relationships, communication, words, verbal abuse, insults
Rosemary Horner is a presentation skills expert who believes in connecting people to their passion, purpose and potential thru caring communications. http://www.rosiehorner.com Your Article Search Directory : Find in Articles
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