Advice Relationships How To Help Your Friend In Her Difficult Times
Help A Friend Who's Seriously Ill
- What you can do: If a friend is ill but mobile, you should take her out to eat every week or two, because sick people often feel isolated. If she's house-bound, bring her some of her favourite dishes, movies, books and music. Don't overstay your visit as she might feel uncomfortable. Acknowledge the illness and ask what the progress is, and then talk about activities of daily living. If she's a close friend, volunteer to do her laundry or help her with house chores that she is unable to do herself. This will help her a lot and take off worries from her mind. Try to be sensitive to her mood swings.
- What you can say: Don't blurt out that she looks awful, but don't tell her she looks great if it's clearly not true. Hug the person and tell her that she will get fine soon. Just be sensitive to her feelings and act accordingly. A sick person needs a lot of rest so let her sleep when she wants to.
- What to avoid: Never tell your friend, "I know how you feel." The truth is that you don't know how your friend feels, so the best approach is to invite her to tell you. Don't make fun of her appearance.
Help A Friend Who's In An Abusive Relationship
- What you can do: The most important thing would be to talk to her openly about the situation. If she is open with you then you can help her plan by telling her how she can escape tho situation. If she wants to break the relationship you can help her by telling her how and what she should talk to her partner. If nothing works out and she decides to run away from the relationship, you can get her spare car keys, cash, mobile phone and things she'll need.
Understand the fear, pain and the chaos she is going through. Offer to let her call from your house, where she'll be safer and give her privacy while she's on the phone.
- What you can say: Privacy is very important in such a situation. Let your friend know that you will not tell anyone about her. if she senses that you're sensitive to her feelings she will tell you all about her situation freely and you will be able to advice her better.
- What to avoid: Don't ask her harsh questions like why she doesn't leave her partner. She can only let go of the person when she's ready. So be with her while she makes up her mind.
Help a Friend Who's In A Financial Crisis
- What you can do: Avoid eating at and going to expensive places. And don't treat her unless it's a special occasion. If you keep paying for it she will feel embarrassed and less empowered. You have to be sensitive to her situation.
- What you can say: Talking about money is the last taboo. Never ask a direct question. Get her to open up by discussing your own financial challenges and money problems.
- What to avoid: Unless she's a responsible person, who is facing an unexpected short-term crisis don't lend her money. Offer emotional support and help her find a financial counsellor. She will feel better this way.
Michael Douglas is a relationship expert and the webmaster of http://www.datersmanual.com where he provides dating and flirting tips for men. Visit his blog on relationships to get tips and advice on building healthy and successful relationships.
Related Tags: help, illness, relationship, in, financial, friend, crisis, recover, abusive, difficult, her, times
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