It is certain that people are usually judged by their appearance, demeanor, voice, attitude, behavior, posture, clothing, gestures, and so on. Many times, it takes only 5 to 10 seconds for you to form an opinion about a person you meet for the first time. Sometimes, you will only be able to form your judgment after a little while. In any case, your judgment reflects your own idiosyncrasies and your own history.

If you want to know what kind of person you are, just look around the people you relate to: make a list of all their positive and negative traits, not behavior, for example, sense of humor, intelligence, temperament, verbal written abilities, rhythm, values, etc.

Examples: you like your cousin Guy because he is very funny and makes you laugh; you like your daughter's ability to get everything she wants; you dislike your neighbor because he is unfriendly and never greets you; you like your boss because she/he is very dependable; you dislike your co-worker because he/she makes excuses.

Now, when you read your list, understand that these traits would not call your attention if you did not have them in the first place. "Wow! How about that? I never realized I had such great sense of humor and made some people laugh hard." "Gee, I never knew that I had such a fantastic imagination." It is so good to realize that we also share great positive qualities with other people. It makes us feel special.

Now, how about the qualities that you don't like in others? You may ask: "Are you sure I have them as well?" "What? Me, making excuses?" "Me, ignoring certain people?" "Me, disrespecting others?" "I don't think so!" You may not like to hear it, but it is very true.

Like a coin, you have two sides, one ideal , that you are proud of and the other a little crooked, that you may want to hide. In any case, it is important that you acknowledge the fact that you are a complex individual and that what you don't accept in another is also part of you. This acknowledgment is very important because it will eventually be the tool that will turn your around toward another being.

This is because you will now exercise your power of forgiveness, thus offering your peace and love to whomever it is that you have misjudged. Of course, when you judge a person favorably, there is an immediate connection for you are reflecting each other. Now, the trick happens when you have to "undo" your poor judgment.

Now, why must you undo your judgment? Because for the world to be at peace, it is necessary for all the people to be in the same peaceful mode. Everyone is part of the whole. You can't wish peace if you yourself are at war, albeit several miniscule ones. You need to take the first step.

Ok. The best thing for you to do is to write another list, this time of all the people with whom you don't have a special relationship. Forget the traits or qualities; you have already dealt with them. Now, for each person, make a list of 5 qualities that you truly appreciate about the person.

Anything will do. Even if it is hard to find something, work on it. You can say for example: "Edgar, I appreciate the white in your eyes. They are very white." "Aunt Vera, I appreciate the mean brownies that you always make when the family gets together." "Mrs. Schmidt, I appreciate your beautiful garden." You get the idea. Five per person to begin with; you can expand on this list later on.

When you are done, write your name and at least 5 things that you appreciate about yourself. Then, go back to the traits that you don't appreciate in others and search where and when you have demonstrated them as well. Then, say to yourself in front of a mirror: "I now forgive myself and my shortcomings. I am a beloved child of God. Let me be the first to spread love. Let peace begin with me."