Emotional Affair - Can It Destroy Your Marriage?

by john peabody - Date: 2010-10-15 - Word Count: 634 Share This!

Emotional affairs, what are they and how can they damage your partnership?

An emotional affair is when your partner has developed a close tie with someone else, for example a workmate and that relationship has become one of a closer and more intimate nature.

Close relationships are usually based on a strong, emotional affinity between two persons. When either of them searches outside to find fulfillment of an emotional or sexual nature, this amounts to infidelity inside that relationship.

Obviously with the Internet, mobile phones and all the new technologies on hand, it is far simpler for your partner to be disloyal to you.

For instance, have you ever been guilty of checking your partner's phone, because they seem to be getting an abundance of text messages and frequently at odd hours? Even though this is a harmful thing to do, if you suspect something is happening, you may find it hard to cease doing it. Perhaps you encounter a name that you don't know and it keeps cropping up again and again and the messages you see are more than just messages between friends.

In this case, if your spouse has a really intimate connection with them, any intimacy that you have in your marriage becomes diluted. Imagine it, sharing your deepest feelings with a person who isn't your partner or spouse displays that you have developed an emotional affinity with them.

Frequently, when confronted, your partner or spouse will cleverly contend with the following question. "Are you saying I can't have friends of the opposite sex?" This is to make you feel guilty and this approach is extremely effective at stopping more questions.

So, if this is occuring, how can you know if the relationship has moved on to a sexual level? The truthful answer is that you cannot. Probably more important, is to recognize that you have experienced a breakdown in the closeness of your relationship.

If your partner or spouse has owned up to becoming involved in at least an "emotional affair", you can start to repair the closeness of your partnership. This is where you need to start to concentrate your awareness and to apply consistent effort to get back the intimacy for a better relationship.

How can you achieve this?

1. Weigh up the Emotional Connection You Have with Your Partner - The reality is that there are no reasons for your partner to be unfaithful, by having an emotional affair or a physical one. You will likely need to know why they cheated. Cheating usually happens because there is dissatisfaction within the partnership or marriage, lack of communication or closeness and then eventually resentment on the part of the unfaithful person. You must check out how you both interact and how good it actually is.

2. How Do You Communicate With Your Partner - Interaction between partners is not purely about talking. It also covers the non verbal communication, which could be as basic as spending time together, showing affection, flirting or maybe just a message to say how much you care for them. Each of these forms of interaction are critical to developing a deeper bond between the two of you. If any of these is lacking, then this could be one of the reasons for your partner going elsewhere to find someone who will fulfil that need and allow them to feel "important".

If the interaction in your relationship has reached the point of being almost nothing, then to save it, you will need to strengthen it by exploring new forms of connecting at a more intimate plane.
This is only the beginning of your work towards a stronger, deeper emotional connection with your spouse. There are also other elements that you will have to work on to achieve a more satisfying partnership. Doing these things will eventually assist you to move beyond your partner's emotional affair.

Related Tags: emotional affair, infidelity in marriage, after the affair, divorce infidelity, affair help

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