Dating Tips: Pursuing Multiple Women
- Date: 2008-05-29 - Word Count: 705
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It's my guess that most of the guys reading don't need much convincing that pursuing multiple romantic entanglements is definitely the way to go. However I think it's very important for us to examine the reasons why as it will at the very least justify our behavior;) And for those guys looking to settle down with that special someone it's even more important for you to understand and follow the guidelines in this article.
When you have multiple options, the loss of one is not a crushing blow. If I am actively pursuing 10 girls at the same time and two of them flake I have a wonderful place to refocus my attention: 8 other lovely prospects. In fact,if you view your failures as learning experiences than you can take whatever you may have learned from the two flakes and instantly apply those lessons to subsequent interactions. In essence, failure can become exciting and fun! (Although clearly it should never be your goal)
There's an old joke that always stuck with me: How do you get to Carnegie Hall? Practice! Practice makes perfect. 'Game' is not something people are born with. It is comprised of many learnable skill sets and therefore takes a certain amount of dedication. The more women you are pursuing, the more opportunities you have to make connections between situations and occasionally have a revelation or two. When I was a kid I used to play the clarinet and set aside a half hour a day to do my scales. Now I set aside an hour or two a day to text and make phone calls to my prospects. And in the evenings I'm out with many of them 'practicing' in person. The point is, the more women you are actively pursuing, the more practice you are getting and the faster you will develop.
Expanding on practice is this variation: Having multiple girls in your sights encourages you to experiment and take risks with them. I cannot overemphasize how essential this idea is. The knowledge that we have other options if one doesn't work out can empower us to take chances that we would not normally take. We can use this newfound freedom to try out new techniques. We can use it to actually go with our impulses instead of blocking them.
All of the most important discoveries and breakthroughs I've made have been a direct result of this concept. You can read about pickup and think about pickup as much as you want but if you're not actually out there taking chances with it you are not going to improve at all. And if you're primarily focused on one girl at a time there is no way you are going to be able to adopt this crucial mindset.
And perhaps the most important reason for having multiple prospects is this: your behavior and your energy will change for the better without even thinking about it. When you consider it, we are consciously putting ourselves in the same position that very high value females are in. They have so many suitors that they can't really keep up and have no choice but to flake in many cases. This is one of the reasons I purposely schedule many of my 'dates' with different women for the same evening. (A concept I expand on in my upcoming product 'No Flakes') Suddenly the traditional roles are reversed and I am the one juggling and rescheduling with them. There is a change in your very energy; it is free (or freer) of any hint of desperation or neediness. The more prospects you have on your plate, theless anxiety you will experience over any one of them. And as women are typically more intuitive than men, they will most certainly pick up on this.
In other words the more women I am gaming, the better my success rate is with them. So to the man who says, "No, I just want to find the one girl for me!" I say in response: You'll have a much better chance of finding her if you're exploring multiple options, and she will probably be much more receptive to you because of the positive changes in your behavior as a result of having those options.
Have fun,
Julian Foxx
When you have multiple options, the loss of one is not a crushing blow. If I am actively pursuing 10 girls at the same time and two of them flake I have a wonderful place to refocus my attention: 8 other lovely prospects. In fact,if you view your failures as learning experiences than you can take whatever you may have learned from the two flakes and instantly apply those lessons to subsequent interactions. In essence, failure can become exciting and fun! (Although clearly it should never be your goal)
There's an old joke that always stuck with me: How do you get to Carnegie Hall? Practice! Practice makes perfect. 'Game' is not something people are born with. It is comprised of many learnable skill sets and therefore takes a certain amount of dedication. The more women you are pursuing, the more opportunities you have to make connections between situations and occasionally have a revelation or two. When I was a kid I used to play the clarinet and set aside a half hour a day to do my scales. Now I set aside an hour or two a day to text and make phone calls to my prospects. And in the evenings I'm out with many of them 'practicing' in person. The point is, the more women you are actively pursuing, the more practice you are getting and the faster you will develop.
Expanding on practice is this variation: Having multiple girls in your sights encourages you to experiment and take risks with them. I cannot overemphasize how essential this idea is. The knowledge that we have other options if one doesn't work out can empower us to take chances that we would not normally take. We can use this newfound freedom to try out new techniques. We can use it to actually go with our impulses instead of blocking them.
All of the most important discoveries and breakthroughs I've made have been a direct result of this concept. You can read about pickup and think about pickup as much as you want but if you're not actually out there taking chances with it you are not going to improve at all. And if you're primarily focused on one girl at a time there is no way you are going to be able to adopt this crucial mindset.
And perhaps the most important reason for having multiple prospects is this: your behavior and your energy will change for the better without even thinking about it. When you consider it, we are consciously putting ourselves in the same position that very high value females are in. They have so many suitors that they can't really keep up and have no choice but to flake in many cases. This is one of the reasons I purposely schedule many of my 'dates' with different women for the same evening. (A concept I expand on in my upcoming product 'No Flakes') Suddenly the traditional roles are reversed and I am the one juggling and rescheduling with them. There is a change in your very energy; it is free (or freer) of any hint of desperation or neediness. The more prospects you have on your plate, theless anxiety you will experience over any one of them. And as women are typically more intuitive than men, they will most certainly pick up on this.
In other words the more women I am gaming, the better my success rate is with them. So to the man who says, "No, I just want to find the one girl for me!" I say in response: You'll have a much better chance of finding her if you're exploring multiple options, and she will probably be much more receptive to you because of the positive changes in your behavior as a result of having those options.
Have fun,
Julian Foxx
Related Tags: dating tips for men, dating advice, the game, david deangelo, neil strauss, mystery method, the pickup artist vh1
To read Julian's thoughts on some of the other guys, check out: Neil Strauss Mystery VH1 Your Article Search Directory : Find in Articles
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