You all know what I am referring to and I'm sure you are as fed up as I am with all the parsing of common words to misrepresent something, someone or both. The parsing of commonly held words is stupid and will not be tolerated by the masses any longer! If an advertiser wants us to dance a jig or jump through hoops to receive their low cost, almost worth nothing, free or freebie item all they must do is simply say so. Rather than parsing of words to mean almost free or free if you are new to our service, or free for the taking but it will exclude you from future almost free or freebies items, just simply say so. Most adults are capable of understanding that you are a business because you want to feed your family. As adults most people don't want you as a business to lose any money. As adults most people would like to know that you are making a fair profit and will be in business for years to come. As adults we simply wish for you to not parse words in an attempt to take advantage of anyone! We are giving you businesses, big and small, fair warning that we consumers are fed up with the parsing of words to take advantage of consumers and we are not going to let it continue any longer. We promise to embarrass you and your company if you continue in the future of parsing words to not mean what everyone takes them to mean. Just so that everyone is on the same page, we have listed what we understand these certain common words to mean.

1) The word free or freebie means simply that - zero exchange of money, postage stamps or anything of value.
2) The word free and freebie mean no exchange of money now or latter and also mean the same for new as well as existing customers.
3) The word free and freebie do not mean that we will be branded to lose out of or to be excluded of any special price or deal at a later time if we take advantage of your free product or service now.
4) The word free and freebie simply mean free, zero cost and zero exchange of valuable information such as our email address or the email addresses of six of our friends. This would also include any personal telephone numbers. Time of year or season does not change these commonly held meanings.
5) The word free or freebie means that we don't have to do anything or offer anything in exchange for your free or freebie product or service.

Now that we have stated clearly what these commonly held words mean to us at large; we expect you businesses, big and small, to understand that we consumers will penalize any company by broadcasting it over the internet to everyone that said company has tried to parse these commonly held words. We believe there is no reason to parse these commonly held words other than to take advantage of another. Therefore we will broadcast across the internet via e-mail, via blogs, via bulletin boards via forums via any way possible now and in the future any company and/or individual that plays games with or parses the meaning of these commonly held words. For the record the meanings of these words are the same whether you are giving us a great or not so great of free or freebie item. We also wish to state for the record that we consumers understand that you businesses must make profit in order to stay in business. We are not opposed to the fact that not every free or freebie item will be of great worth. We however expect the meaning of these commonly held words to remain just the same, regardless of worth of free or freebie item. May this article serve as fair warning to all businesses, big and small, that we consumers are fed up with all the parsing of commonly held words to take advantage of any consumer!

As a consumer, if you agree to this writing then it is expected of you to hold all businesses to these rules and if some business does not, you have the responsibility to make said infringement known to the masses via one or more methods listed above. Every concerned consumer should print out this little article and keep it handy and ready to post or serve such business and/or individual that breaks these rules. This article is free, zero cost, will not exclude you from future freebies, and will not require you to post personal information or the personal information of six friends. You need not do anything to print it out and post it. This article is completely free of charge regardless of time of day or season of year. This article is simply, FREE!