Relationships and Work Problems:

Stress in general can contribute to depression. There are stresses involving work, maintaining a home, caring for children, financial, and sexual problems. As people get older there is the stress of dealing with elderly parents. With jobs being shipped overseas, no one has a great sense of job security. Depression will tend to hit you the hardest if you are separated or divorced. This makes sense because there is always a sense of loss, of failure, even if you both agree that you will do better apart. You are dealing with change, and change always causes stress. Even positive changes cause stress. Staying married to a person who is toxic for you is never any good and can cause real depression problems. If you are married to someone and feel hurt, unloved, criticized, and not valued, you are bound to have a problem with self esteem. After all, if you are a good person, why should you be treated in such a bad way? Anger at your spouse can have a way of turning around and coming back into you, making you feel guilty, like there is something unlovable about you. If you are an unhappily married woman, you are very likely to suffer from depression.

Having Children

Women do have a lot of hormonal changes when they become pregnant. Hormonal changes affect the brain messengers so there is a possibility of depression involved. There is a real mix up of brain chemicals right after a baby is born and some women are more likely to have a very upsetting depression. It is called Postpartum Depression or many people call it the 'baby blues'. Frequently if you have had a problem with depression prior to having a baby, you may be more likely to suffer from more depression after your baby is born. It is so scary to have depressive feelings when you are supposed to be totally joyful over a birth. Sometimes if you experience this you feel too guilty bring it up. You need to understand that this is a hormonal imbalance and it is OK to get some help and possibly some medication to help you through this time. Don't feel awful. You love your baby but you need a little chemical adjustment. It is also true that you become exhausted taking care of a baby, not getting enough sleep. This is worse for single parents who have to handle all this alone. With people moving all over the country to get jobs, more couples are bringing up children without the support of relatives. Most couples really are not prepared for the big difference a baby will make in their lives. Men can feel very jealous about all the attention given to the new baby and be less supportive with the mother. There is more stress if both parents have to work and arrange for child care. The more that is demanded of you when you have the stress of nurturing a new family member, the more pressured, worried, and depressed you can feel. Sexual desire and romantic moments tend to fly the coop when a baby has colic and demands constant attention.

Having children starts a total change in your life. You have the children to take care of for at least 18 years. Plus these days with children returning home after they experience life problems, they can be with you well into your 60's. The financial and economic costs of raising a child have risen unbelievably, let alone the emotional demands. Children are so pressured by what their peers have and make unrealistic demands on parents who can not afford to give them what they desire. Often you feel like you are giving everything you can to a child who then thumbs his nose at you and tells you that you aren't making the grade. This can cause a great deal of depression. Family ties are so special and important but we all know they can be the source of great distress and problems