Food and weight obsession has become a national pastime. Nearly 4 out of 5 women hate their bodies. This leads to incredible feelings of shame and self denial. Most of us have been taught to idolize the skinny models that adorn fashion magazines. We were also led into years of dieting dysfunction by our well meaning families and friends attempting to help us achieve society's thin ideal.

As a woman who has struggled with emotional eating for 35 years, I thought the answer was finding the right diet. Now I know better.

Recently it has been revealed and admitted by the medical community that diets just don't work for 90-98% of all people. In the April 2007 issue of The American Psychologist, the Journal of the American Psychological Association, UCLA researchers reported that diets don't work in the long run.

According to the latest results of a composite study done at UCLA, Traci Mann, Associate Professor of Psychology at UCLA and lead author of the study said, "We found that the majority of people regained the weight, plus more. Sustained weight loss was found only in a small minority of participants while complete weight regain was found in the majority. Diets do not lead to sustained weight loss or health benefits for the majority of people."

For so many years, I bounced back and forth from diet to diet, until I found Weight Watchers and followed through, going back as many as 20 times in an attempt to lose weight. Then in 2001, I finally reached my goal weight. I managed to keep the weight off for over 6 years, thinking that I had it all figured out. Yet my life was miserable. I was caught in patterns of overeating, skipping meals, over-exercising and in constant fear of regaining the weight. I thought if only I could control what I was eating, I'd be okay. I was wrong. The problem was not what I was eating, but what was eating me! Now I realize that the dieting was a part of the problem that distracted me from looking at parts of my life that were unfulfilling.

As a Professional Coach, I've learned that the reason why diets don't work is because they fail to address the emotions that push you to eat when you're not hungry. When you are carried away by the momentum of your emotions, it is not possible to attend to what you are eating, be mindful and nurture yourself.

You're too busy battling with your feelings and dealing with the little critic that sits on top of your shoulder and spouts negative comments about your weight and your body. The good news is that you can transform that critic to a supportive coach but it requires that you change your thinking. By taking that step, you generate new empowering habits that support your new empowered self image.

Today I'm no longer restricted by a diet. I eat what I want, when I want and pay close attention to how hungry I am and what I am feeling. I look in the mirror and see all of me. I'm no longer made up of disparate parts. I don't see myself as a pair of flabby arms, dimpled thighs or a tummy. I love myself as I am. I'm still on the road and haven't yet arrived at my destination, but I am loving the journey.

Now I eat like a naturally picky eater. I am no longer a slave to food because I've learned some very important principles that have changed the way that I think about myself and my relationship to food. Since the focus has come off of what I am eating, I spend more time doing things that I love, enjoy my life more and appreciate myself and love my body as it is. As a result, the excess weight on my body and in my life are slowly and surely melting away.

If you're a woman who has struggled for years with being overweight, feeling afraid of eating real food, caught in a cycle of binging and dieting, then you may have to consider that you are a part of the majority of those like me, for whom dieting does not work. I'm here to tell you that there is an alternative and it doesn't include dieting.