Tell or Don't Tell
Have you every been in a situation where your children constantly bug you about buying things but your income does not allow you to buy everything they want? You are probably saying dah they bug me everyday. But do you tell them no and not giving them a reason why? Now I am talking about teenagers or children older than 12 years of age. I was always told "When I say no I mean no and I don't have to give you a reason because you are the child and I am the parent". Well, I learned real quick that this statement does not work anymore so, by letting my older kids in on certain issues I am able to sleep at night.
A few months ago my wife and I where having money issues that was causing a lot of stress. We didn't know whether we were going to be able to put food on the table thee next day. At the same time my 14 and 12 year old boys were in soccer and was constantly hounding me about buy soccer equipment, going to dances, going to high school football games, buying things for their girl friends. I was at the end of my rope and didn't know what to do. One day I had to pick up my oldest from soccer practice and on the way home I snapped when he started bugging me about money. I saw tears rolling down his face and at that moment I knew I had to decide whether to tell him or not. I pulled the car off the side of the road and told him in a calm tone that we were in a money bind. Yes, I told him everything and since that talk I have not heard anything from him. About two days after our conversation his twelve year old brother did the same thing so I told him. Now I have been able to sleep at night.
By telling my boys the reason for me saying no when it comes to money has given me a better relationship with my kids. I don't have to say no a thousand times a day and my stress level has been lowered. By saying no and not giving them a reason I was not giving them enough credit.
ou know we tell our kids everyday to come to us about their problems but when we have problems we are to afraid they are too young to understand. But how young is too young and how much do you tell. I guess it would be up to the parent to decide if too much information is harmfuland at what age the children. So, if you are in the same predicament I was in give it a try and tell them the reason for the "NO" and you may be surprised at the results
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