How many times in your life have you been asked "what do you do for a living"? And how many times have you actually answered the question? I bet very few. You probably answer this question by stating your "title" but suffice it to say that telling someone your title really gives the inquirer no real idea of what you actually do.

I have been talking to people about their careers for as long as I can remember and more because I am always fascinated by people's response and less because I am going to get the answer I am looking for, I always start out my inquisition with the same question - "what do you do for a living?" Nine times out of 10 the person answers ‘I'm a marketing assistant" or "I am in sales" or the very specific "I work in HR". Inevitably their face also matches their tone which usually indicates to me that I would never want to be whatever it is they just told me.

So, the last time I asked someone my favorite question I got to thinking how different the world of work might actually become if people really began answering the question and instead of allowing their company or industry or really insufferable boss to define them, began to take ownership for how they see themselves.

I have a friend who is thoroughly impressed with titles and as soon as he hears someone is a president or CEO he perks up and immediately attaches an undeserved amount of respect his or her way. I say this not because I don't think there are plenty of presidents and CEOs out there who deserve respect but there are plenty that not only don't deserve it but have truly miserable jobs that you could not pay me millions of dollars to do. But, for some reason my friend equates this title with money, power, prestige, and greatness and even more misguided, happiness.

So, I asked my friend what he would need to be able to do at work on a daily basis in order to feel really satisfied, successful and dare I say, happy. He had a pretty quick answer which got me very excited as I could see the new direction taking shape already; but, he promptly brought me down by saying "but it could never happen". A very long conversation ensued which involved my assurances that anything is possible but which ended with us coming up with an entirely new way of describing his current job. When asked before what he did, this was his typical response, "I'm in marketing". Once I got past the boredom of that response however I was able to get him to tell me what it is he does at work that he loves. I asked him why he goes to work every day and what tasks he does that he really enjoys. Then, I encouraged him to narrow it all down to one or tow descriptive sentences that would actually answer the question "what do you do for a living?"
Here's what he said. "I have parties for my company all week long so that the world will know how great our products are and will continue to buy from us. I travel, meet new people every day, and get to learn from some of the best people in the industry."

The best part about this was that the tone of his voice even changed. He actually seemed connected to his work and he even told me how much better he felt about his work from this one little exercise.

Now, imagine you are at a party and you ask "so what do you do?" Would you rather hear "I am in marketing" (snore) or "I have parties for my company all week long so that the world will know how great our products are and will continue to buy from us. I travel, meet new people every day, and get to learn from some of the best people in the industry"? (oooh tell me more)

There is plenty of research out there that supports the idea that our self talk has a tremendous impact on how we feel internally and how we appear externally. With over 80% of the population admitting that they are unhappy in their work and a great percentage of those people unable, for whatever reason, tragic or self-imposed, to make a job or career change, there has to be something little that can be done to make the current state of affairs even just a little bit better.

So, I think the first thing everyone should do is throw out their old and tired titles, change their vocabulary, and come up with a new answer to the question "what do you do for a living?" See what you can come up with. Nobody asks "what is your title at work" (unless they are completely inept) so don't answer that question. Tell me what you do and say it with confidence and style. Make people want more. When people ask me what I do, I don't tell them I am a career coach because I know they will either look at me with those glazed over bored eyes or they will look at me like I am crazy because they have never heard of it before. So, instead I say "I help people get ecstatic about their work and I help them unite who they are with what they do". That usually attracts most people's attention and it not only makes me feel better about my work but it makes me seem much more interesting and I am always up for that.

Do you have a new "title" you want to share? I'd love to hear it. Let's see who can come up with the best description of what they do. Email to: melani@mycareerfitness.com.