I'll Be Happy When
How many times have you heard or used the expression: "I'll be happy when..."? We've all said it. I'll be happy when I have more money, when I find the perfect partner, when I change jobs, when I get a promotion, when I get a new car, when I have a new home, when I lose weight, when my child graduates, when I retire, when I live in a different location, when I can take a vacation. The list could go on and on.
And have you ever noticed how someone else's behavior can impact your happiness? I was reminded of this recently while standing at the check-out counter in the grocery store. The woman in line behind me was on her cell phone talking to a friend. I heard her say how upset she was with all the traveling her husband had to do for his job. She remarked that he was never home and that when he was, he was too exhausted to make any plans with her. After a few more complaints, she ended by saying: "I'll be happy when he quits his job!"
I mention this because we tend to think happiness is dependant on outside circumstances, situations, events and people. We believe that bliss comes as a result of certain things happening. But we have it backwards. Happiness comes from the inside AND THEN manifests on the outside in the form of results. We also think that other people are responsible for our happiness (or unhappiness); that what someone else does or doesn't do has a direct impact on our joy. But the truth is - happiness is a choice we make in every moment no matter what is occurring around us. It's not a destination that we reach at some point because something happens or someone does something. Happiness is a feeling that is entirely up to us and is directly related to our thoughts.
Let me share another story with you:
One of my favorite inspirational authors (Joe Vitale) posted a personal story on one of his websites. Two weeks ago his main computer crashed, his laptop stopped working, all of his websites went off line for no apparent reason, and he ended up in the hospital with emergency surgery to have his appendix removed. Now that certainly seems like enough to make someone unhappy! And the fact is, most people would have complained about these setbacks and been really miserable. But here's what Joe said about his situation: "I didn't see the experience -- any of it -- as negative. I was never angry, upset, fearful or any other negative emotion. I was at best curious. I'd also say it was an enforced vacation." Instead of being unhappy with all the turmoil in his life, Joe CHOSE to be curious about why he had attracted this experience and he CHOSE to be happy about having some much needed downtime.
The next time you start to say, "I'll be happy when. . . or I'm unhappy because. . ." think about this quote from Abraham Lincoln: "Most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be." Don't wait for something or someone to change in the future. Make up your mind to be happy NOW and watch what unfolds!
Vicki Miller, CUCG, PCC / Copyright February 2007
Related Tags: stress, attitude, gratitude, happiness, positive attitude, being happy, being in the now, joe vitale
As a Life Transition Coach I teach clients the five steps to a prosperous life now! I help my clients identify and remove obstacles in the way and bring clarity and focus to their dreams. Are you undergoing a major transition and not clear where to turn? What's the most important thing you would ask a coach if given the opportunity? Call (972-306-4489) or email me, (coach.v.miller@verizon.net), to set up a complimentary, no obligation 30 minute telephone coaching session. Download my FREE e-Book, 12 Fun Ways to Change Your Life, or sign up for my FREE monthly newsletter at http://www.thrivingthroughchange.com or http://www.directsellingleadershipcenter.com
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