Can He Marry Me? I Ask
Several experienced ladies the world over have since learnt that ‘I love you' may not necessarily lead to marriage denote real love. Perhaps you need to know this too but not in the hardest way possible. This may mean nothing but that infatuation you may or may not have ever heard all your life. Too bad if you spent almost your lifetime with this seeming man of your dream and in the end you disappointingly discovered that you have been jettisoned for a newer lady much younger than you.
This may arise out of negligence or ignorance because you did not do much to discover what or who your man is. Or were you blinded by love?
But just how do I know that he will eventually marry me?
The following will help you understand whether your relationship with him is heading for marriage or not and possibly give you ideas on how not to delay or help your man to delay your own marriage which you have always wanted by all means:
(i) If you are old enough for marriage and it is what you want by all means, always set in the issue of marriage in other to scare him away. It is possible to sometimes find men who are bent on making sure they have their way sexually before pushing the lady aside and exiting the relationship scene. All you need do is discuss your marriage proposals with him often and often with him thereby affording him the opportunity of abandoning you on time if he is not genuinely interested in you. Understand that the earlier he abandons you the better for you to enable you find a more serious guy in your life who may just be it.
(ii) If he demands for sex more often than you personally can imagine know that he is only lusting after you and may have been attracted to you as a result of sexual attraction. Learn to do away with him very quickly in life or you will end up as sexual partners. Remember a man can sleep with any lady just to satisfy his desires. A man can go to the extent of sleeping with mistresses, small girls, cripples, mad women etc. All he is concerned about is to fulfill the sexual desires in him.
(iii) Study your man very well. Do not give in easily to his demands less he uses you and subjects you to abandonment.
(iv) Does he tell you about the millions of naira or dollars he has almost in every Bank including the Swiss Bank and IMF? Watch it. He just might be enticing you with money in other to win your love and when he eventually gains the whole of you he is sure to abandon you. If on the other hand, all he complains about is his bankruptcy, emotional and financial failures wanting you to in a way part with what you have know you are in for it and walking out on it all will rescues you otherwise be ready to be dumped while he gets another to quickly replace you.
(v) If you ever caught him play the Casanova role in the movies of female world yet you tolerated him simply because he has given you his word, he is very handsome, academically bright, a man any lady will desire to have by her side at any given time you have to be prepared to face the worst. A playboy will do you no good instead will he will shatter your heart and no man will ever be able to gather the pieces.
(vi) Your may appreciate everything in him but the problem or rather your concern is that he promises but never keeps to any of these, know that he is out to satisfy his sexual desires using you. Realize that every man will always want to spend on that woman he loves or at least fulfill certain of his promises for the fear of losing out to another guy.
(vii) A ladies may unluckily play into the waiting hands of a time-wasting man. This man deliberately resorts to time wasting fearing that the days of his promises may soon arrive and he may be compelled to make fulfillments against his personal wishes. When the days of his promises approach, he quickly and easily finds evasive opportunities. Such a relationship may not walk you to the aisle.
(viii) If your man is a sex freak, a sex machine that always wants you in bed leaving no concern for you and your health. He comes to you asking for this much whether you are sick or not, depressed or not, wronged or. My advice is let him go.
(ix) Always discuss with your man on his past, this will enable you know him and give you a better understanding of his character and the relationships he had in the past and the reasons behind the failures of all of these. Never let your man persuade you to ignore his past life. This may be very dangerous to you and the relationship in entirety.
(x) If you are going out with a liar, watch it. Sooner or later your relationship will be shattered. Avoid liars called boyfriends. It will lead you to no where in particular as you will soon begin to discover versions of terrible of lies after the other.
YOU MAY BE THE PROBLEM IF:
(i) You hang out with other men yet you give him the impression that you will marry him. Nothing scares a man as much as this. No man ever wants to share his woman with another man not even his own father. You may think you are an expert in employing various lies and subterfuges but he may soon find out. If he is also not the serious type he will assist you in furthering the waste your time.
(ii) If your attitude is so bad that everyone in the street has had to complain about you, you will likely not get married within the soonest possible time except you decide to change your attitude for good
(iii) Quite a lot of ladies remain undecided on matters concerning their marital life and the result is that their situations remain stagnated as they will have to lose one man after the other.
(iv) Worse is the fact that he believes you have regular sex with other men when you are still his girl friend and he is hoping to marry you. In this case, you will achieve nothing but a break up of your relationship.
OTHER REASONS
(i) Ask yourself if he is mature as to take decision leading to marriage. It will amount to a waste of time if you expect a man who considers himself not mature enough or even psychologically prepared to get married to you soon. He may out of pretence appear to do so but you have to probe and decide whether to wait or not.
(ii) Is he still under the influence of his parents, family or past girlfriend(s)? This will help you determine whether you are getting married soon
((iii) Is he the first child? Many burdens have sometimes rested on firstborns making it difficult for them to carry the burden of a woman much less a wife. So find out.
(iv) If you give him the impression that you are not yet prepared for marriage while you actually do, or that it greatly lies with your parents to take this decision for you, then you have in a way scared him away.
(v) Never compare your man with another man you have just met or the relationships you had in the past. This may send the signal that he is not your match causing him to quietly abandon or waste your time the more.
(vi) If you are too demanding then you have given the impression that you are no go area for him. Men have sometimes gone into hiding to avoid over demanding ladies in their lives. So be moderate in your demands. Know the capability of your man know what he can afford, know his limit and be reasonable.
When all these are met, you will soon be found side by side with your man where you will say ‘I do' to each other in the presence of invitees.
Related Tags: relationships, dating, love, romance, marriage, singles, divorce, sex, sexuality, sexual intercourse, womens issues, true love, infatuation, fornication, love-making
Emeka Esogbue hails from Ibusa, Delta State, Nigeria. He is is a History and International Relations graduate with lots of tremendous published and unpublished and unpublished works.
emekaesogbue@yahoo.com
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