Dating Articles - The Super Ex-Girlfriend
A few nights ago, I went out to dinner with an ex. When I got to the restaurant he was smiling. 'It's so good to see you,' he said. And I could tell he meant it. If only he'd looked at me like that when we had been going out, we'd probably still be together.
Now that there is nothing at stake, I can be the girlfriend he always wanted. For example, at four o'clock in the afternoon he called to let me know he might need to cancel dinner that evening. ‘That's fine,' I said. 'Just let me know either way.' He was amazed. 'Why couldn't you have been this easy-going when we were dating?'
Here's why: because now, I don't care. Why is that so hard to figure out? As long as I'm not emotionally invested, I don't feel rejection. And when I'm not looking forward to something, there's no disappointment when it doesn't happen. It doesn't matter if he cancels - because I haven't planned for a week ahead of time what I'm going to wear. Also, I don't take the cancellation as some kind of sign that I'm not a priority. I already know I'm not a priority - we established that five years ago when we broke up.
Without a Care
Not caring means there's no jealousy either. He can talk to me about his sex life with his new girlfriend as much as he wants. He might as well be talking about the stock exchange. That's how little I care. I can listen intently to what he's saying now too, because instead of wondering what he really means, all I feel is relief that I no longer have to second-guess every word that comes out of his mouth.
Spending time with an ex-boyfriend is easy because there's a familiarity without all the complications. Things don't have the significance they once had. For example, he can look at his watch and he can say certain things that I don't mind him saying. An ex-boyfriend saying 'You deserve to be with someone special' is one thing. It's sweet. But when he was my boyfriend and he said this, I found it depressing.
For some reason, when you're the ex, everything that was the problem in the first place becomes affectionate nostalgia. Over dinner he was talking about his current girlfriend and he mentioned that what he liked about her was that she wasn't needy. ‘That's the complete opposite of you' he roared. ‘You never knew when to let go.' Oh, the memories.
So now that I don't care any more and nothing matters, I can relax. Which has led me to a crucial realization. I'm so much better as an ex-girlfriend than I am as a girlfriend. From now on, when I meet someone new, I should give them a heads up and say: ‘You'll hate me while I'm your girlfriend but trust me - after we break up you'll fall in love.'
For more articles on sexual health subscribe to Sandra Prior's online newsletter at http://intercell.shacknet.nu.
Related Tags: care, life, sex, caring, ex, together, boyfriend, girlfriend, rejection, broke up
Your Article Search Directory : Find in Articles
Recent articles in this category:
- How to Find a Russian Partner
A relationship developed online is a trend these days. Many men actually prefer to start a romantic - Things You Should Not Talk About on a First Date
First dates can be stressful, but they can also be a lot of fun. If you make the situation low press - Low-cost Dating Tips To Suit Your Tastes
Dating has always been an expensive affair. However, if you're running on a drawstring budget, then - How To Pick Up Girls - The Art Of Approaching Women
So, you want to learn the art of picking up women, do you?Well, for one thing... it's not easy, at l - Real World Dating Advice For Men - How To Handle Your Insecurities Around Women
Feeling insecure around a woman is something that ALL men can kind of share in. Whether or not we sp - Are You Looking Forward To Make New Friends?
In today's fast paced life, phone has become an essential commodity. Everyone is busy in his daily s - Thai Girls Dating Online: Does It Help You
Thai girls are perceived that they are so sweet. Dating with nice Thai girls have been converted int - Become Happy With Ukrainian Dating Tips & Advice
It is about time you settled down or at least had more fun. Ukrainian dating and meeting Ukrainian w - Free Phone Chat- Revolutionary New Way To Make Boost Your Social Life
From online chatting to phone chat, the step is but a small one. Movies and books all portray fallin - Bad Boys Versus Good Guys - Why Women Are More Attracted To The Bad Men
I personally have had my share of bad boys in my lifetime and after many broken hearts and life less
Most viewed articles in this category:
- Dating: Gay Online Services
Gay online dating websites have already helped millions of people find their soul mate across the gl - Dating And How To Attract A New Love
Here are some easy rituals to attract a new love partner. There's an ancient east Asian concept cal - How to Have a Beautiful Relationship With a Girl
1. Things to already have and believeYou know who you are and believe in yourself and what you can o - Great First Dating Impressions
There are those who will offer you very old fashioned secrets to impressing single women for love an - The Secret Body Language Of Sexual Attraction
What body language in a female demonstrates sexual attraction? You'll know from my previous articles - The Phenomenon of Prickteasing
I love this topic right here. First let me say I draw the reference 'pricktease' from the movie ' - Attract Better Dates Like Magic
If you want to meet someone special, you have to get out of the house. But you can go out every sing - Dating For Singles
The desire to find a member of the opposite sex for a partner (we call it marriage nowadays) has bee - Dating After Divorce
Many single Christians are confused when it comes to dating after divorce, as each church seems to h - Online Dating Sims Games Bringing Realism To Dating
Online dating has become very popular and with so many members now interested in such sites the soci