Negative self talk is destructive of our self-esteem, happiness, and potentially harmful to your health. Imagine having a friend who constantly criticized you. "You look terrible", "why did you say that?" "They probably will hate you", "You know you can't do that! No one is able to accomplish that, why would you think you can?"

How long would you keep this friend? Well, for many of this, that "best friend" is our own inner dialogue of negative self-talk. Any positive thought or feeling in our head is met with a reason why it is wrong. Why do we allow ourselves to continue this self-limiting talk? Negative self talk is like being our own worst enemy.

It's been said that you can't afford the "luxury" of a negative thought. I don't know what is luxurious about thinking poorly about your self! The fact is those negative thoughts have immediate corresponding effects in your body that can last your entire life. They have negative power to limit your aspirations, happiness and success because they have taken hold in your belief system. When you try to step away from those negative beliefs, it's almost like you can hear and see the original setting where the negative message was first said to you.

To see how this works, conjure up one of the negative thoughts that you repeat to yourself. It is probably an issue that has great power in your life. Sit quietly by yourself, and say it out loud. At the same time, focus your attention on where you are feeling the reaction in your body. Or say something that you've heard someone say to you, and try to connect with how your body feels. Your response may be subtle or very obvious. If you feel shamed from what was said, or embarrassed, look at your posture. Your facial expressions are an obvious place where your internal thoughts are shown to the world.

No matter how old you were, I bet you can still vividly remember anything hurtful that kids said to you in school. Those teasing messages left a scar not only in your mind, but in your body as well same time. Our thoughts and our body's reactions are inextricably interwoven, and until you can purge and release those negative thoughts, they remain festering sore in your body. Your body is hard wired to the words you use to describe yourself and the words that people say to you. We are not a mind in a body - we are Body/Mind.

Lousie Hay explains how certain types of beliefs create certain types of illnesses. Many people get angry when they first hear this concept, or dismiss it immediately. They think that if you believe this, it's your "fault" that you get sick. It's not your fault, it is our programming, and you didn't understand the inter-relationship of the negative thoughts and illness. But once you do understand, it can make all the difference if you practice different techniques to replace your negative thoughts with positive ones.

Retrain your mind to replace negative thoughts

I have read many articles that tell people NOT to think of negative thoughts. That simply doesn't work! It's like saying "don't think of a purple elephant". Your mind instantly conjures up a picture of what you don't want to think about! Instead, prepare an alternate thought that is based upon a positive affirmation. It fills the vacuum left by the dismissal of a negative thought.

Retrain your mind with Inspirational Quotes.

"A quote can change the way you think about challenges you face."
Catherine Pulsifer

For most of my life I have been a voracious reader and have collected quotes of all kinds. Although so many of these quotes were written many centuries ago, their essential truth remains the same. Humans had the same trials and tribulations then as now.

I have noticed that every place I've visited has some kind of written message on their wall, be it a business or home. I speak often of the importance of "Words To Live By", and realize that this statement is both figurative and literal. People need to have these words posted nearby to remember, re-inspire and motivate them, especially in hard times.

The idea of keeping those inspirational quotes on your walls, and even subscribing to the inspirational quote of the day, is to keep yourself focused on the positive.

We are what we repeatedly do.
Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.
- Aristotle

Practice and create new habits of being your own best friend; your own cheering section. Notice and congratulate yourself for doing the things you want, even if it's a baby step. Don't give up - a baby falls constantly when s/he is learning to walk, but never gives up!

A new habit takes 28 days of consistent repetition. You had many years of practicing speaking negative messages to yourself, so give yourself time and encouragement to change your mind and see the resulting change in your body!

If you won't be your own best friend, and say all the things you would say to someone you truly love, why would you expect anyone else to take that role? You can do it!