Resolving Conflicts in Relationships

by Syed Quadri - Date: 2006-12-20 - Word Count: 606 Share This!

Differences in relationships are inevitable. The coming together of two people with different needs, values, personality, and experiences in their lives, provide enough opportunity to cause clashes. Conflicts are necessary and important for the growth of any relationship.

One of the most common emotions which come to the forefront during an argument or conflict is anger. It is necessary to know the ways to resolve differences in opinion and control anger in an appropriate manner. Let's discuss some ways to resolve the conflicts and manage the anger to create a more positive and healthy environment. Sorting out difference is the basis for being able to build a trustworthy love relationship.

Anger Management - We all realize that anger management is pivotal for the good health of our relationships. A progressive and growth oriented relationship is one when you realize that by being angry with each other, you shall not be able to obtain a productive outcome. Due to our defensive attitude, we tend to stop listening to what our partner. Our emotions run high and provoke us to get angry. We are responsible for our anger and our feelings during fights. It's not your partner who makes you angry, but you choose to get angry as a direct reaction to the contributing factors. The best way to manage anger and resolve differences is to work towards the common goal of creating a conjugally happy atmosphere, one where you and your lover can interact in a positive manner while keeping your fragile emotions away from tearing the relationship apart.

Time Out during arguments - Ever tired Time Out? It's an effective way to regain your composure while trying to defuse a potentially volatile situation. However, the success of this method is dependent on effective contribution from both the people involved, you and your partner.

The method is simple. In situations where you feel you are going to lose control over your anger and become disruptive, you need to ask your partner for time out. However, before you leave, you should schedule a time to meet again in an attempt to address the issues at hand. Being reactive and overly sensitive in a relationship can destroy it. Therefore, when you delay your response to the issue at hand to later, when you are more in control and regrouped, you are consciously increasing the chances of being able to communicate and listen better!

Open Communication - In order to successful diffuse conflicting situations, you need to learn how to communicate, openly without bias. Do not pull up your defenses and thereby prevent any attempts of communication from your partner. Only when you listen to your partner, shall you be able to understand that person's point of view. So work towards expressing your needs and feelings and allow other people the same opportunity. Do not shut your feelings as this shall make you resentful and cause friction in your relationship. Being open to communication at all times is vital for the health of any relationship, especially a romantic relationship.

Hurt, resentment surface when we get angry. Conflict is a natural precursor to the growth and health of a good relationship. However, it needs to be handled carefully in order to protect the sanctity and trust of your relationship. Work towards avoiding an instant reaction. Pause. Think before you act and always focus during the argument. Anger is a result of an unmet need, or a perceived threat besides other things. Find the root causes, try not to blame anyone, and try to work together as team to create a win-win situation so that you can accomplish your relationship goals with minimal difference!

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