Approaching a Woman: How Your Friends and Her Friends Fit In
- Date: 2007-10-19 - Word Count: 681
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Picture a perfect pick-up that happens in the movies.
A beautiful woman is sitting at the bar by herself, sipping a cosmopolitan. She's all dolled up and wearing a glamorous outfit. Out of nowhere, a charming man comes up and sits next to her, striking up a conversation. Time passes, and without any distraction or interruption, they go home together.
Has this ever happened to you? Have you ever seen this happen? Not very likely.
There are two important parts of a night out that this popular movie scene leaves out: her friends and your friends. While it is fine to go out solo, most of the time you will either have a wingman out with you, or be out with other friends that you came with.
At the same time the girl you're interested in most likely did not come alone. What kind of girl dolls herself up for an hour and a half just to go to the bar by herself? It does happen from time to time, but most of the time, they'll be with girls, and often guys, as well.
How most guys handle this is walking straight up to the girl and not addressing the friends. Big mistake.
Now, I know what you are thinking... "This sounds harmless."
Luckily, that is why I am here for you! Because...this sin is really dangerous!
If you simply walk into a group of hot girlfriends and plan on just talking to your "hottie", then you are in for a giant surprise, because if you try to isolate with her, you'll be finished quickly.
Here's why:
Singling out one girl FORCES her to talk only with you. Now you are making her ignore her friends.
Now, she doesn't want to be mean to her friends, so she will politely -or impolitely- blow you off to rejoin her friends. Her friends don't want to be blown off either... so when they see this happening, they frequently will "save her" from you by dragging her away.
You may not understand this, but this is how women think.
However, there is an easy solution!
The solution lies in winning her and her friends over at the same time. Then, and only then, you move to talk to her separately.
It really is that simple.
So instead of talking to one girl, talk to the entire group. Once you have won the group over, you will be able to talk with the girl you are interested in.
Another mistake that men often make is ignoring their own friends, once they're in set with a beautiful girl.
This one is simple...
Let's say you're talking to a HOT girl... named "Candy"...
First of all, congrats!
But then, one of your friends comes up to you and says, "Hi!" and you say, "Hey bro, this is Candy... anyway..." and continue talking only to Candy! You don't even turn to face him, but stay enraptured talking to the girl and obviously want to limit interruption in your conversation flow with her.
You see, you are so wrapped up in this new "hottie" you just met, that you unintentionally ignore your friend and continue your conversation with Candy...
This is a big, big mistake...
This tells Candy that a perfect stranger you just met is more important to you than your friend. She knows that she is the "perfect stranger."
What do you think that says about you?
It says that you are desperate, whether or not you actually are.
Desperation is a major turn off because it tells her you are trying very hard to get her. She already knows she has you. The chase is off and the attraction dies.
So don't ignore your friends!
When your friend walks up to you and her, turn completely to face him, and pay more attention to him then her, until he moves on. Then you can go back to talking to her exclusively.
And, remember...
Be Social,
-Mehow
Mehow is an internationally known dating coach featured on MTV and YoungHollywood. He has developed a 3 minute attraction method for nightlife, and has led thousands of men to greater dating success. He publishes a free seduction newsletter which you can get by emailing gtg_nightlife@getresponse.com. His website is http://www.mehow.tv
A beautiful woman is sitting at the bar by herself, sipping a cosmopolitan. She's all dolled up and wearing a glamorous outfit. Out of nowhere, a charming man comes up and sits next to her, striking up a conversation. Time passes, and without any distraction or interruption, they go home together.
Has this ever happened to you? Have you ever seen this happen? Not very likely.
There are two important parts of a night out that this popular movie scene leaves out: her friends and your friends. While it is fine to go out solo, most of the time you will either have a wingman out with you, or be out with other friends that you came with.
At the same time the girl you're interested in most likely did not come alone. What kind of girl dolls herself up for an hour and a half just to go to the bar by herself? It does happen from time to time, but most of the time, they'll be with girls, and often guys, as well.
How most guys handle this is walking straight up to the girl and not addressing the friends. Big mistake.
Now, I know what you are thinking... "This sounds harmless."
Luckily, that is why I am here for you! Because...this sin is really dangerous!
If you simply walk into a group of hot girlfriends and plan on just talking to your "hottie", then you are in for a giant surprise, because if you try to isolate with her, you'll be finished quickly.
Here's why:
Singling out one girl FORCES her to talk only with you. Now you are making her ignore her friends.
Now, she doesn't want to be mean to her friends, so she will politely -or impolitely- blow you off to rejoin her friends. Her friends don't want to be blown off either... so when they see this happening, they frequently will "save her" from you by dragging her away.
You may not understand this, but this is how women think.
However, there is an easy solution!
The solution lies in winning her and her friends over at the same time. Then, and only then, you move to talk to her separately.
It really is that simple.
So instead of talking to one girl, talk to the entire group. Once you have won the group over, you will be able to talk with the girl you are interested in.
Another mistake that men often make is ignoring their own friends, once they're in set with a beautiful girl.
This one is simple...
Let's say you're talking to a HOT girl... named "Candy"...
First of all, congrats!
But then, one of your friends comes up to you and says, "Hi!" and you say, "Hey bro, this is Candy... anyway..." and continue talking only to Candy! You don't even turn to face him, but stay enraptured talking to the girl and obviously want to limit interruption in your conversation flow with her.
You see, you are so wrapped up in this new "hottie" you just met, that you unintentionally ignore your friend and continue your conversation with Candy...
This is a big, big mistake...
This tells Candy that a perfect stranger you just met is more important to you than your friend. She knows that she is the "perfect stranger."
What do you think that says about you?
It says that you are desperate, whether or not you actually are.
Desperation is a major turn off because it tells her you are trying very hard to get her. She already knows she has you. The chase is off and the attraction dies.
So don't ignore your friends!
When your friend walks up to you and her, turn completely to face him, and pay more attention to him then her, until he moves on. Then you can go back to talking to her exclusively.
And, remember...
Be Social,
-Mehow
Mehow is an internationally known dating coach featured on MTV and YoungHollywood. He has developed a 3 minute attraction method for nightlife, and has led thousands of men to greater dating success. He publishes a free seduction newsletter which you can get by emailing gtg_nightlife@getresponse.com. His website is http://www.mehow.tv
Related Tags: women, dating, romance, pick up artist, mystery, david deangelo, pick up girls, approaching
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