An addict's life is pretty sad. Their minds are constantly cluttered with how to satisfy their needs for what they are addicted to, so they don't have too much time to enjoy life.

The husband/wife of an addict also tremendously suffers. They often times feel lonely, frightened, and overwhelmed. Their world is as stable as a two legged stool. Unfortunately, the answer is not always as simple as divorce especially if you have children. You want what is best for your child, so that they will grow up into a good life.

In this article you will read 5 ways children of addicts suffer and what you should do to help your children grow up to be happy and content with life despite living with a parent who is an addict.

1. Self-blame. When parents do things a child knows is wrong they blame themselves for their parents behavior. They feel that they are causing their parent to spend hours and hours on-line or getting drunk. No matter how many times you show them that it has nothing to do with them, they cannot emotionally accept this and they continue to blame themselves.

2. Shame and embarrassment. Children can usually feel when things aren't "normal" and don't fall for all of your explanations, "Daddy is very tired, so he sleeps all day." "We don't fight, it's mommy's way of arguing." They know that their house isn't like their friend's houses and they are very embarrassed of it. They will try to cover it up but this makes their friends suspicious of them and it causes them to have problems making friends.

3. Confusion. They can't make out what is happening. On the one hand their parent cares for them and helps them and all of a sudden they yell, swear, and throw things. They live in constant confusion (and fear).

4. Anger. When they read about or see other people's more structured families they get mad at their parent for not making such a family for them. On top of this they are mad at the whole world for not stepping in to help them have a nice family..

5. School and health problems. It is very hard for children's of addicts to succeed in school. While "normal" children look forward to a good night's sleep to "re-energize" their nights are full of fair of what they might hear or see. They don't have too much room in their heads to learn their lessons because their heads are filled up with excuses for their parent's behavior and being angry with the world.

Knowing the problems that your child faces is obviously not enough. The important thing is to know how you can help your child cope.

Don't fool yourself into thinking that if you show your child lots of love then he will be able to overcome this difficult challenge. The problems are much too severe to be solved by an extra dose of love and compassion.

The way you have to go is to get in touch with competent social worker, clergyman, or doctor to direct you and/or your child to go to a support group as soon as possible. The members of the group will help your child deal with the embarrassment, to make sense of what is happening around him/her, and will give the tools that they need to succeed.

It might embarrassing for you to look for help but isn't your child's welfare worth the initial embarrassment?