Understanding the Antecedent
Here's a good example of finding and removing the antecedent to a behavior. A child keeps taking her shirt off. No matter how many times she's told to keep it on she takes it off again. Her mother notices that before her daughter took the shirt off that she would twist and fidget with the part of the shirt that is close to her upper back. It turns out that she did not like the feeling of the shirt tag against her neck. By removing the tags from her shirts the girl was able to leave her shirt on and be comfortable. Many times seemingly inexplicable behaviors do have a reasonable antecedent. This is especially true when sensory issues are accounted for.
Autism is being discussed in many magazines and books as more research is done and the number of diagnosed cases increases. Because of this it may be tempting to share advice you get from a television program or magazine article. Many parents find this kind of advice to be insensitive at the worst or redundant in the least. They live with autism as a part of everyday life, so when someone who knows little about it tries to give advice it is not generally received well. It may even be mistaken as criticism.
Instead of relaying the information that you read or watched you could mention that you saw a television program or red an article that you thought they might be interested in. You could then lend them the magazine or tell them what channel you saw the program on. This way they can form their own opinion on the information instead of feeling that you are trying to give advice or criticism.
Many parents and caregivers also need to vent sometimes. If they complain about a behavior or something that happened they are not usually looking for advice or a solution. Unless they explicitly ask for suggestions just listen and offer your support by being there. Often they are just tired or stressed, and they feel that others can not relate to their problems. As with any kind of stress there are highs and lows; there are times they feel in control and times when they feel despair. Listening is one of the best things you can do at those times.
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