Betrayal Of The Soul: Lessons Learned From Emotional Abuse


by Yukio Phillips - Date: 2007-03-06 - Word Count: 327 Share This!

Fairy tales such as Cinderella and Sleeping Beauty always had a happily ever after ending. When we dream of our knight in shining armor we expect the same thing.

A Fairy tale is make believe. Our lives are reality.

What happens when we find ourselves involved with a relationship that doesn't feel right to our soul?

If we run after the make believe story, we tend to shut off connection to our sense of what is real. We betray our souls.

Are there situations in your life that you rationalize away because of fear or low self esteem?

This is the very situation that lead me to stay in an abusive marriage.

My self esteem was connected to my marriage. He knew exactly what to say. I felt like the most beautiful and wanted woman in the world.

So when he verbally tormented me, I rationalized it. Or I excused it by saying, he had a bad day. He really does love me. He thinks I am beautiful and says he loves me.

Looking back in my past, I realized that I didn t feel beautiful without someone telling me. This was my trap.

Illusion disguised as love.

Best selling author Melody Beattie in her book Codependent No More says that abusive or controlling relationships are based on insecurity.

We learn how to depend on the abusive person emotionally.

Instead of wanting the emotional support we need them instead.

The magic is in others, not us, we believe. The good feelings are in them, not us. The less good stuff we find in ourselves, the more we seek it in others.

What do you think about that last quote? Does that ring true for you? I know it did for me.

I came to believe that this man was the best that I could ever have for a marriage. This revealed to me how much value I felt in myself.

Allow your intuition to guide you. Know that the strength your Creator put inside you can overcome any fear that comes your way.


Related Tags: self-esteem, christianity, emotional abuse, verbal abuse

Yukio Strachan Phillips is an author and Registered Pharmacist with a Doctorate in Pharmacy. As creator of http://www.boldandworthy.com her passion is to empower women to identify and shatter false beliefs that keep them in abusive relationships. Her special area of focus is raising awareness of spousal abuse in Church Communities across the world. Her Powerful Ezine will inspire people to rise above the limitations that past experiences have left on today. You can sign up for her ezine at http://www.boldandworthy.com where you will find more resources for healing wounds of emotional abuse with more exciting programs to come very soon.

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