Is Your Spouse Cheating? Look For The Signs
- Date: 2006-12-05 - Word Count: 715 Share This!
If you have a hunch your partner isn't telling the truth about working late, possibly, just maybe your spouse could cheating on you, your suspicions will grow, and can eventually take control of your life, meaning no sleep, being unable to work properly and often making you snappy and impossible to be around.
If this sounds like you then you need to get to the bottom of things, you need to find out the truth. If you think something's not right, you need to do some investigation before confronting your spouse. If your spouse is cheating on you, there are some common, subtle signs that you can look for.
Your partners new lover will need to get hold of your spouse, you may start receiving anonymous phone calls, when you answer the phone, the other person hangs up. If this begins to happen frequently, it is a good idea to record the phone number and ring at a later date (from a payphone so your number isn't recognized). Be careful not to jump to conclusions however. Remember there are other possible reasons for hang-up phone calls, telephone faults, kids playing pranks etc.
Another sign to look for is if your spouse starts working extra hours, coming home late from work, or taking a lot of business trips. Try and verify these instances by calling the office to see if your partner is there late, or getting an itinerary, calling the hotel room or office unexpectedly.
A big sign is if your spouse stops wearing their wedding ring. Possible reasons for this are weight fluctuation, or occupational hazard, other than this, you should start asking questions.
He's not interested in sex - If his sex drive suddenly declines significantly, it could be a big sign that he's unfaithful. Some men are simply not interested in their wives sexually once they have a new partner; others feel too guilty to have sex with their wives when they're sleeping with someone else.
He starts hiding bills. If you suddenly no longer have access to his cell phone bill, the home phone bill or his credit card bill, it could be a sign that there's something on those bills he doesn't want you to see.
He suddenly wants to try new sexual techniques. This is a good sign that he's learning these techniques elsewhere.
When someone is in a new relationship they are often a lot more conscious of their appearance. If your spouse randomly joins the gym or paying large amounts of attention to their appearance, this may be another sign of cheating.
He starts to showering you with gifts. For some men this gifts are only given on a very rare occasion. If your spouse is suddenly away from home more than usual, but brings you a gift nearly every time he does come home, he could be buying you gifts both to ease his guilt and to avoid making you suspicious.
If your spouse is demonstrating some of the above behaviors, it may be time to think about your own investigation. Take time to examine their behavior and see if there are clues as to why your spouse might be looking elsewhere; though there are certainly situations where there don't seem to be any concrete reasons why people cheat.
If you believe your spouse is cheating, it may be wise to look for some evidence before you confront him. Many cheating spouses will tell you that it's "just your imagination" when you confront them with your suspicions. If you want to get to the bottom of the situation once and for all, confronting him with evidence is the best way. Find those cell phone bills he's been hiding. Read his email. Check into his travel arrangements for those business trips.
Having a cheating spouse can virtually turn your world inside out, it can create one of the most difficult, distressing situations we'll ever face. But, until you know once and for all whether or not your spouse is actually cheating on you, you can't begin the healing process of either you're own independence, or working on your relationship. Intuition is often right on target; if you think something is wrong, there's a good chance you're right. So, take the time to find out what's really going on in your marriage so that you can get on with your life.
Susan Jackson offers free advice to anyone who has suspicions -and needs to know more about how to catch a cheating partner From collecting evidence, to keeping your suspicions secret, to the emotional side of dealing with these difficult times.
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