Responding to Your Thinking


by Joe Farcht - Date: 2006-12-21 - Word Count: 857 Share This!

What You Think: What you think influences what you see. What you think influences what you do. What you think greatly affects your experience. What you think determines what you learn. What you think makes work and life easy or hard. What you think creates wonderful or broken relationships. What you think determines the quality of your life. What you think controls what you manifest into your life. What you think differentiates you from everyone else. What you think shapes your world. What you think is everything.

Where has your past thinking taken you? Has your thinking led you to travel to wonderful destinations, obtaining beautiful possessions, creating great relationships, work that is enjoyable and challenging, or a life that is filled with joy and happiness? If not, why not? Does it have something to do with your thinking? Choose positive, creative, loving, life-affirming thoughts and see what it brings to your work, life, and world.

The Story You Tell Yourself: What story do you tell yourself when ... the boss gives you extra work, when your customer doesn't pay his/her bill, when you interact with a difficult co-worker, or when your child misbehaves. The story you tell yourself is highly influenced by past and repeated experiences. So much so, that if you would observe your thinking, you might find that most thinking, associated stories, and your responses to them are automatic.

Take the age old story of the driver who cuts in front of you as you are motoring down the road. What story do you tell yourself? Is the story one of fear, danger, and violation followed by aggressive emotions, words, and gestures? Many people, especially early in life, have been socialized to think and respond in that way. Or is your story one describing how the driver didn't see you followed by shrugged shoulders. Another story could be that the driver was scurrying to the hospital with his wife lying on the back seat about to deliver a child (followed by a compassionate response).

Couldn't any of these three scenarios be true? In each of the three scenarios, your feelings, emotions, and reactions will be governed by the story you tell yourself. Choose the right story and you create the most positive outcome for yourself and others.

Many of your experiences and the meanings you assign to them in work and life are repeated and become habitual stories. These stories then control and dictate your responses to future situations and experiences. Check it out.

How do you think when ... you interact with a difficult coworker? How do you react and respond? What story do you tell yourself? Take other situations in your work and life, especially negative ones, and ask yourself, "What story do I tell myself? How does that story determine my feelings, emotions, and reaction?"

Being open to positive stories can lead to gathering more complete information and creating much improved interactions and outcomes.

The stories you tell yourself can be a conscious choice. What situations in your work and life can you apply new stories too, to experience more pleasant and positive responses and experiences?

There are at least three stories for each and every situation you encounter. Tell the right story and enjoy more of your work and life.

Response Able: I know people and I know you know people who are not "Response Able." Put another way, they are not responsible! It's not their fault. They didn't cause it. Why it was the accounting department's mistake (choose any department or entity you want). Their boss is a micromanager and s(he) will do it any way. The owner forces them to be this way. Their wife or husband is the problem. Life is just like that!

When you are not responsible, then you are not in control. Not being in control is easy and convenient, isn't it? You're not in control, it's not your fault, and so you don't have to be responsible. That's just the way it is. Hog-wash!

You seize control and live life to the fullest, or you shrink away and live a mediocre existence. You take responsibility for your life (you ably respond), make positive choices, and create the life you want to live. You set exciting goals for your work and life, become responsible for results, and make them happen.

If you fall short, which we all will do from time to time, you ask, "What more can I do the rise above my circumstances and get the results I desire." Then, you take that action. No snibbling, no waffling, no excuses, no pointing fingers, no blaming others, and no shrinking from the challenge. Just positive forward motion to create the results and work / life you want to live.

A life unexamined is not worth living. Examine your life now. Are you being responsible in all areas of your work and life? Are you in control or are other things and people controlling you. Are you able to respond to every life challenge in a positive and constructive way to create the life you want to live? Take your answers and make the changes you choose to become more "Response Able."


Related Tags: thinking, positive thinking, story, stories, response, response able, accountable

Joe Farcht is the founder and president of Leadership Advantage, Inc. His purpose for living is to develop and coach leaders, executives, managers, and supervisors to new levels of success in their work and life. You may learn more about him and his services at Leadership Advantage, Inc.. Please contact Joe at joefarcht@cox.net or at 602 996-1802.

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