Closing The Gap On A Long Distance Relationship
- Date: 2006-12-05 - Word Count: 409
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Nowadays with work and online dating many people have turned to long distance relationships. It is hard enough having a long distance relationship, but when the long distance part ends and you move back to living near or with each other it can suddenly seem a whole lot harder. There is a certain adjustment phase which can make or break any relationship.
Your long distance relationship ends and suddenly you find yourself insecure about your relationship. It is easy to separate your feelings for the person when they are emailing you to tell you they love and miss you, but when you have to face the person daily you also have to face the day-to-day dating issues that come up. Rapidly you find yourself discussing where to eat, what to do, what bills to pay, and so on, when before the hardest decision was what time to call.
At first you will go through a honeymoon phase that every long distance relationship goes through when you finally get together. Everything will seem so wonderful now that you are able to see each other whenever you want. It ends quickly however, and you may find that you enjoy the solitude that you once had while online dating. You may also realize that you don't want to see the person everyday or even a couple of times during the week. Some people fall in love with long distance dating because you still maintain your independence without the compromise that must happen when you find yourself dating someone.
You need to first accept the fact that you can't live in fantasy land anymore. Before the two of you come together, discuss what needs to be done to ensure that you can live near each other and still keep the spark that you feel when away from each other. You need to take this time to discuss your general habits, your financial situation, your living situation, what you expect out of the relationship, and how slowly you will move after a long distance relationship. In some ways it is like starting all over again with someone new. You need to learn their lifestyle and how they go about their day. Things like what time they wake up in the morning can suddenly seem crucial. If you take the time to talk about every little detail that didn't seem important before you can make your long distance relationship into a long and happy "short distance" relationship.
Your long distance relationship ends and suddenly you find yourself insecure about your relationship. It is easy to separate your feelings for the person when they are emailing you to tell you they love and miss you, but when you have to face the person daily you also have to face the day-to-day dating issues that come up. Rapidly you find yourself discussing where to eat, what to do, what bills to pay, and so on, when before the hardest decision was what time to call.
At first you will go through a honeymoon phase that every long distance relationship goes through when you finally get together. Everything will seem so wonderful now that you are able to see each other whenever you want. It ends quickly however, and you may find that you enjoy the solitude that you once had while online dating. You may also realize that you don't want to see the person everyday or even a couple of times during the week. Some people fall in love with long distance dating because you still maintain your independence without the compromise that must happen when you find yourself dating someone.
You need to first accept the fact that you can't live in fantasy land anymore. Before the two of you come together, discuss what needs to be done to ensure that you can live near each other and still keep the spark that you feel when away from each other. You need to take this time to discuss your general habits, your financial situation, your living situation, what you expect out of the relationship, and how slowly you will move after a long distance relationship. In some ways it is like starting all over again with someone new. You need to learn their lifestyle and how they go about their day. Things like what time they wake up in the morning can suddenly seem crucial. If you take the time to talk about every little detail that didn't seem important before you can make your long distance relationship into a long and happy "short distance" relationship.
Related Tags: first date ideas, plan a date, fun date ideas, romantic date ideas, find a date, things to do
Ron Zvagelsky has a degree in Business Administration from the University of Southern California. He graduated Magna Cum Laude in May 2006. He is currently the Chief Executive Officer of PlanJam - where you can find dating and relationship advice.
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