3 Keys to Better Small Talk Conversation
Do you want to know how to overcome the challenge of not having anything interesting to say? Some people are afraid of striking up a casual conversation with a total stranger, or with people that they would not normally talk with because of the fear of not having anything interesting to say.
Fear of rejection is also another obstacle to making small talk. Remember that small talk in a conversation merely serves as a point to warm up to each other and get to know each other - the point is that you can get things going by talking about mundane and trivial topics, which is more acceptable than suffering from an even more awkward silence. Take a look at some of these tips for small talk conversation:
1. Try to make the other person feel comfortable.
Some people, no matter how successful they are at work or how confident they are with themselves, just seem to shrink at the thought of having to make small talk. They find the entire process uncomfortable, awkward, even pointless. However, if you stick to this way of thinking, you will have a pretty small world if you refuse to let others in, so to speak.
The key is to think that the other person may feel even more uncomfortable than you do - so if you will not make the first move to start the small talk, who will? Try to make the other person feel comfortable by starting off with a casual comment or question, or even greeting them with a simple 'Hi' or 'Hello'.
2. Find a general point of interest and start off from there.
Once you have made the first move and uttered the first word when making small talk - there is no turning back. You need to keep things going - at least for the next couple of minutes or so - before you can gracefully say your goodbyes and make a polite exit. So what do you talk about in the meantime? Think about the things that you yourself would like to share to a new friend and that is what you can ask the other person about. Work, family, where they live, and their hobbies or interests are some general points of discussion.
To keep the ball rolling, you can use follow up questions to show that you are really interested with what they have to say. Restaurants, movies, music, news, the weather, traffic, favorite tourist or vacation spots are other things that you can use as small talk topics of conversation. Once you find common points of interest, things will definitely take off from there.
3. Remember that small talk equates to casual and brief conversations.
Small talk can turn out to be a pleasant and gratifying experience. What you need to remember is that your conversation should be brief and casual without turning it unnecessarily into a long, drawn out and boring conversation that could even take an awkward turn. Listen intently, ask questions and go out of your way to make the other person feel as comfortable as possible.
If it is the other way around and you are the one who is being asked to join in a casual chitchat, do not turn out to let yourself dominate the conversation. Think of small talk conversation as a juggling act, where the ball does not need to stay too long in one hand and everybody should get to participate. Stop worrying about how big of a fool you may appear to be, instead focus on what the other person has to say.
You may even find out later on that you have the 'talent' of getting people to open up to you by engaging them in small talk. In no time at all, your insecurities about being rejected should you make the first move in a casual scenario will be all for nothing - because you may actually have the knack for making small talk conversation!
Related Tags: conversation, better, keys, small talk
Peter Murphy is a peak performance expert. He recently produced a very popular free report: 10 Simple Steps to Developing Communication Confidence. Apply now because it is available only at: conversation starters
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