9 questions to assure you truly understanding what you see and hear

Obviously last Wednesday, August 1 got everyone's attention when the bridge in Minneapolis collapsed. We offer our condolences to those families with losses.

My daughter called me later that evening and indicated everyone was fine on their end. The son-in-law and grandson were fine. They had headed to the Twins Game that evening, stopped for some snacks, then decided to take University instead of 35W and the bridge.

Upon hearing about the bridge on the radio, they went to a parking lot with a high view and could see some of the carnage. No one is sure if they would have been by, on or past the bridge when it collapsed, but glad they made another choice.

What is really interesting is how our politicians and government leaders have now moved infrastructure repair to the front of the discussion, even over Iraq!

So what is the connection to you as a manager or a salesperson?

What is meant by "Your Awareness Aptitude"? Read on to find out .......

I want to start this out with an example.

An Amish boy and his father were making their first trip to a large mall. They were amazed by everything they saw, after all it was the first time they had seen most of this.

What really intrigued by the two shine silver walls that moved apart and then back together again.

"What is it?" the young boy asked.

The father, who had never seen an elevator, responded, "Son, I have never seen anything like this in my life, I don not know what it is."

While the boy and father stood watching in amazement, a very large and older women went up to the wall, pushed a button and stepped into the small room behind the sliding walls.

The father and son watched as the walls closed, the numbers on the dial above the walls went up in number, stopped and then came back down to 1.

The walls opened up and out walks a very attractive 20 year old women.

The father said quietly to his son.... "Go get your mother."


Now every one of us knows what an elevator is and that it moves people up and down large buildings. Yet imagine being someone who sees it for the first time and is trying to understand what is happening!

Obviously the father and son had a very limited understanding of something we take for granted everyday. Because of this they come to a very erroneous conclusion that it changes how people look!

Now we can laugh at this and see the humor in their assumptions. Yet are we doing the same thing when we listen to our customers or employees? Are we fully aware of what is being said or done?

Here are some quick questions to ask ourselves to check our Awareness Aptitude:

What was actually said?
What words were actually used?
What tone or context was used in conveying the words?
What body language was noted?
What facial expressions were displayed?
What was the key crux or issue that was trying to be conveyed?
What causes this to be the key crux or issue?
What is the other parties' frame of reference on this topic?
What is your frame of reference?

Take your last conversation with an employee or last sales call, how would you answer these questions? How many might be a challenge?

If you can confidently answer all of them with specifics, Congratulations, your Awareness Aptitude is off the chart!

If you can confidently answer more than 6 of the questions, you are above average in your Awareness Aptitude!

If you can confidently answer 4 of the questions, you are about average.

Of course, less than 4 you have a challenge ahead of you.

The real point is that we should be able to address all these questions to some degree of accuracy!

Now you'll note we put average as the ability to address 4 of the 9!
The reality is that most people, even leaders, managers, politicians and salespeople are not always aware of all 9 points!

Why not? Because we have never really been trained to do so! Did you get listening and observing skills in school? In collage? In your last company training?

Yes, every program and seminar you have been to talks about listening and maybe observing, but do they actually give you the tools to be a better listener or what to listen for or observe?

My guess is probably not!

To cover these 9 questions in the balance of this article would be nice yet not realistic. What I will recommend is jotting these 9 questions down and being aware of them in your conversations over the next couple of days. See what happens to your observations and listening because of them.

Just last evening I realized how not having these in front of me caused a significant miscommunication!

I wonder if our politicians and leaders had always aware of these 9 in their conversations over the past decade, if a bridge in Minneapolis might have had a different outcome?

When counseling with managers and salespeople, I often ask them these 9 questions in reference to an issue they are dealing with. Guess what the results are! Yep, they realize they really do not have a complete understanding of the other parties view or context!

What happens though is they can now go back and approach the situation with new insight and new objectives. When they do, the results will usually be different and more positive for both parties!

As a sales professional, this should be our main focus, to get as great an understanding about our customers as we can. As managers the same applies to our reports and how they see the world.

Let's avoid being the father and son and assuming outcomes based on erroneous input and references. Let's instead ask the right questions and get the full view of the other party. Then we can truly start making a great difference for our team and customers!

Want increase your "Awareness Aptitude"? The Leadership Strategies program will move your awareness forward. You can get more information here. http://www.busarconline.com/Competitiveedge.html

We will tackle the 9 questions over the next few articles, be sure to be here!

Till next week, work on one of the 9!
Harlan Goerger
National Director of Training

© Harlan Goerger 8/2007