Step-Family Preparation - What Is It Anyway? Part 4


by Alyssa Johnson - Date: 2006-12-05 - Word Count: 326 Share This!

Welcome back to your step-family preparation guide. We've already discussed how important evaluating who you are once you aren't married and helping your children grieve their losses are to this process. Now I want to review your third preparation area: to effectively adjust to all of the changes you've encountered as a result of the divorce and to prepare for the upcoming changes of your new marriage. This part of the journey is one of constant change, equilibrium, and adjustment. Just when you think you've got a handle on things, they will change on you. During this time, you will be required to evaluate how your life is different. In what ways is it better? In what ways do you still feel a sense of loss?

Another type of change to manage is adjusting to your children's reactions to your dating. This is a new concept for kids. If they are teenagers and dating themselves, it can seem especially weird to them to see a parent dating too. Your dating will change different aspects of your relationship with your children. A simple example is that you may spend less free time with them because you'll be going out with someone else instead of hanging out at the house with them.

Once you're in a committed relationship and marriage plans are proceeding, adjustments again will take place. As a couple, you will have to make many decisions. These include such things as where will you live, who will be in the house with you, how parenting roles might shift, and how the children's roles in the family will shift. One adjustment that many couples don't take into consideration is that there will probably be less couple time once you are married due to attempting to combine families.

Accepting change as the norm is the quickest and best route in moving through this path. It's when we try to force life to stay the same that we become the most frustrated.


Related Tags: dating, children, change, divorce, step-family, remarriage, blended families

Visit http://www.Remarriagesuccess.com for more information on how to prepare as a couple and a family for remarriage. Subscribe today to the Remarriage Success Tips E-Zine at http://www.Remarriagesuccess.com/e-zine.htm for more helpful articles to guide you on your step-family preparation journey. Alyssa Johnson, MSW, LCSW is the founder and CEO of Remarriage Success. She may be reached through her website at http://www.Remarriagesuccess.com

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