Ease The Pain Of Divorce - Rent Near Your Family
- Date: 2008-07-18 - Word Count: 592
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When Rich and Debi decided to get a divorce, they of course considered what the cost would be to their children, both short term and long term. They knew that divorce can cause serious problems and issues that extend far into adulthood, and though they wanted to proceed with the divorce, they also knew they wanted to reduce these ill effects on their two children, Anna and Libby, as much as possible.
The first step they took to make it easier on their children was to sit down, as a family together, and talk about the situation. In many cases, parents do not even realize the importance of such a simple gesture. If the children of a divorce see the parents trying in unison, in a calm way, to explain what is happening, it makes the children have an initial feeling of at least a tiny bit of security, even if in many other ways they are falling apart. If, on the other hand, one of the parents takes the children aside behind the others back, this is a very underhanded way to begin a process that is already difficult enough, and children such as Anna and Libby, who are very observant, do not miss much, and will know that the situation is very unstable. In turn they will feel unstable and much more vulnerable as well.
Rich began looking for homes for rent in the area. He knew that when he began the process of finding homes for rent that he might be interested in, he only wanted to look at those homes for rent that were in the general vicinity of where Debi would be living with the children. Rich knew that being near his daughters would make a big impact on how they felt. If his options of homes for rent to choose from had been somewhere far removed from his children, who would be staying the majority of the time with Debi, he realized this could cause a feeling of abandonment to open up in his daughters. After his search of homes for rent in the area, he found one that was small and comfortable, and met the needs he had for when his daughters came to visit him.
Another step, perhaps one of the most important, in helping their children cope with the divorce, was that Rich and Debi wanted them to open up as much as possible. Bottled up feelings are no good in any situation, especially one such as this. Both parents urged their daughters to speak what was on their mind, even if they thought it would be hurtful. Because in the end, it would help everyone to know where everyone else stood. And more importantly, it would relieve a burden from the childrens chests that they could potentially carry far into adulthood, thus causing problems with future relationships.
Debi knew that telling her girls it would all be all right, and everything was fine, was not being fair to them. She was as honest as she could be about the situation, without saying things that would frighten Anna and Libby, or cause them any unnecessary feeling of instability. Also, she decided to take the girls to a counselor who worked with families going through divorce, to have an objective professional who might have more tips or strategies to helping her children cope with the situation.
All in all, divorce is a horrible situation, for parents, and especially for any children involved. But like any horrible situation, it is possible to find ways to make it a little better.
The first step they took to make it easier on their children was to sit down, as a family together, and talk about the situation. In many cases, parents do not even realize the importance of such a simple gesture. If the children of a divorce see the parents trying in unison, in a calm way, to explain what is happening, it makes the children have an initial feeling of at least a tiny bit of security, even if in many other ways they are falling apart. If, on the other hand, one of the parents takes the children aside behind the others back, this is a very underhanded way to begin a process that is already difficult enough, and children such as Anna and Libby, who are very observant, do not miss much, and will know that the situation is very unstable. In turn they will feel unstable and much more vulnerable as well.
Rich began looking for homes for rent in the area. He knew that when he began the process of finding homes for rent that he might be interested in, he only wanted to look at those homes for rent that were in the general vicinity of where Debi would be living with the children. Rich knew that being near his daughters would make a big impact on how they felt. If his options of homes for rent to choose from had been somewhere far removed from his children, who would be staying the majority of the time with Debi, he realized this could cause a feeling of abandonment to open up in his daughters. After his search of homes for rent in the area, he found one that was small and comfortable, and met the needs he had for when his daughters came to visit him.
Another step, perhaps one of the most important, in helping their children cope with the divorce, was that Rich and Debi wanted them to open up as much as possible. Bottled up feelings are no good in any situation, especially one such as this. Both parents urged their daughters to speak what was on their mind, even if they thought it would be hurtful. Because in the end, it would help everyone to know where everyone else stood. And more importantly, it would relieve a burden from the childrens chests that they could potentially carry far into adulthood, thus causing problems with future relationships.
Debi knew that telling her girls it would all be all right, and everything was fine, was not being fair to them. She was as honest as she could be about the situation, without saying things that would frighten Anna and Libby, or cause them any unnecessary feeling of instability. Also, she decided to take the girls to a counselor who worked with families going through divorce, to have an objective professional who might have more tips or strategies to helping her children cope with the situation.
All in all, divorce is a horrible situation, for parents, and especially for any children involved. But like any horrible situation, it is possible to find ways to make it a little better.
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