Empowerment: Steps Toward Controlling Distractions and Moving to Your Greatest Success


by L. John Mason - Date: 2006-12-28 - Word Count: 927 Share This!

Self-Empowerment

The only true empowerment is self-empowerment. If you are granted power from an outside source, you may find yourself manipulated by those "granting" this power.

It is easy to feel powerless. There are so many situations and interactions that you passionately care about but can not control. Caring for, but not able to control, defines the most stressful things that confront our lives. As examples consider what we often can not control such as:
what happens to our children as they move around in the world
or how our spouse responds in a difficult situation
or what the boss demands
or what happens to our aging parents
or what direction the economy turns, etc.

These are issues that can have great significance to our lives. What we can control, and the best place to start our own movement toward empowerment, is how we respond to these stressful events. We can respond like "victims" or we can respond like we can control the directions that we can steer our lives.

First, we must take responsibility for what has happened and any part that we may have played that put us into this challenging situation. (Blaming other people or institutions does not help solve the problems.) We must find a way to "accept" this situation and then find a better way to move forward. (If we can not find acceptance, then we may fall into a pattern of asking "why it happened" rather than what can be done differently to move beyond this "testing" situation.) For example, in the case of a severe health challenge, do you want to spend time and resources wondering why this happened or do you want to pursue the best treatment options and then get on with the treatment?

Often we can get "paralyzed" by being overwhelmed by the stress and anxiety. We can wallow in the anxiety or depression rather than swimming side ways across the current until we can free ourselves from the "rip tide" and move into safer waters. It is important to realize that when we can not control the situation, we can control our physical, mental, and emotional responses. Instead of getting "sucked into the drama," we can focus on being in the moment, breathing slowly, releasing unwanted tension and distracting thoughts, so we can find the most appropriate solution. If we learn to use these anxiety controlling techniques, and use them preventively, we can minimize the negative responses and have more available energy to solve the challenges that confront us.

It is surprisingly common for people to develop a new, more empowered response to old habituated reactions. "It did not seem to effect (or bother) me the way that it used to…" or "In the past, I would have gotten upset when my family did this…" Learning to physically "let go" of stress and anxiety will empower you to release negative reactions mentally and emotionally.

This is easier said than done, but you can learn to "let go" of stress and anxiety and then move into a self-empowering state of self-control. This will actually free up your time, enhance your focus to increase your productivity, give you an energy boost, and improve the quality of your life. Who wouldn't want that? (If you do believe this, then try the following steps and attempt to prove this wrong.) The steps to controlling your response to stressful situations and anxiety are not too complicated. In fact, the process is simple to understand. The trick is in the follow through and repeated practice until you master the process. Your motivation will be tested. Just remember, it will take a bit of time and repetition, and it is not as easy as swallowing a pill. Self-empowerment is never that easy and do not believe anyone who says that it is "easy."

Understanding the way stress and anxiety affects you physically and emotionally is the first part of the process. Read more about the "Physiology of Stress" at http://ezinearticles.com/?Physiology-of-Stress:-The-Way-the-Body-Responds-When-Stressed!&id=97310. Then understand how you can reverse the effects of your habitual stress response. Learn to breathe slowly and diaphragmatically. Find your way into the present moment, in a positive way (not by experiencing anxiety.) A challenge will be in learning to "let go" of stress by learning to warm your hands and feet by releasing tension in your circulatory system (and going exactly opposite direction the anxiety reaction will take you.) It will demand regular practice to learn to warm your hands and feet, but you can learn to do this. (Hint: If you "try too hard" to warm your hands/feet, you will actually move in the opposite direction. Using biofeedback temperature training is a simple, but powerful, way to develop this new skill. (An article is available at: http://ezinearticles.com/?Control-Symptoms-of-Stress-with-Temperature-Training-Biofeedback&id=90394 )) The secrets will unfold when you learn to warm your hands and feet, though this often requires 8-12 weeks of daily practice of relaxation techniques like Autogenic Training Phrases or Visualizations combined with the temperature training biofeedback. Once mastered, you will not be a victim to the distractions of stress and anxiety. You will free up your energy and your creativity.

You can feel the difference in the way you respond to critical life situations and find the self-empowerment that comes from within. Remember that this does mean that you will be able to control all aspects of the world that surrounds you, but you will be better able to invest your available resources in pursuing the most positive directions.

Along the way, please take good care of yourself. Find the balance in life that makes the journey the most worthwhile and healthy.


Related Tags: health, wealth, stress, anxiety, success, happiness, happy, empowerment, self-esteem, self-control

L. John Mason, Ph.D. is the author of the best selling "Guide to Stress Reduction." Since 1977, he has offered Executive Coaching and Training.

Please visit the Stress Education Center's website at http://www.dstress.com for articles, free ezine signup, and learn about the new telecourses that are available. If you would like information or a targeted proposal for training or coaching, please contact us at (360) 593-3833.

If you are looking to promote your training or coaching career, please investigate the Professional Stress Management Training and Certification Program for a secondary source of income or as career path.

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