The Entrance Into Society
- Date: 2006-11-27 - Word Count: 600
Share This!
The desire of pleasing is, of course, the basis of social connexion. Persons who enter society with the intention of producing an effect, and of being distinguished, however clever they may be, are never agreeable. They are always tiresome, and often ridiculous. Persons, who enter life with such pretensions, have no opportunity for improving themselves and profiting by experience. They are not in a proper state to observe: indeed, they look only for the effect which they produce, and with that they are not often gratified. They thrust themselves into all conversations, indulge in continual anecdotes, which are varied only by dull disquisitions, listen to others with impatience and heedlessness, and are angry that they seem to be attending to themselves. Such men go through scenes of pleasure, enjoying nothing. They are equally disagreeable to themselves and others. Young men should, therefore, content themselves with being natural. Let them present themselves with a modest assurance: let them observe, hear, and examine, and before long they will rival their models.
The quality which a young man should most affect in intercourse with gentlemen, is a decent modesty: but he must avoid all bashfulness or timidity. His flights must not go too far; but, so far as they go, let them be marked by perfect assurance.
Among persons who are much your seniors behave with the utmost respectful deference. As they find themselves sliding out of importance they may be easily conciliated by a little respect.
By far the most important thing to be attended to, is ease of manner. Grace may be added afterwards, or be omitted altogether: it is of much less moment than is commonly believed. Perfect propriety and entire ease are sufficient qualifications for standing in society, and abundant prerequisites for distinction.
There is the most delicate shade of difference between civility and intrusiveness, familiarity and common-place, pleasantry and sharpness, the natural and the rude, gaiety and carelessness; hence the inconveniences of society, and the errors of its members. To define well in conduct these distinctions, is the great art of a man of the world. It is easy to know what to do; the difficulty is to know what to avoid.
Long usage a sort of moral magnetism, a tact acquired by frequent and long associating with others alone give those qualities which keep one always from error, and entitle him to the name of a thorough gentleman.
A young man upon first entering into society should select those persons who are most celebrated for the propriety and elegance of their manners. He should frequent their company and imitate their conduct. There is a disposition inherent, in all, which has been noticed by Horace and by Dr. Johnson, to imitate faults, because they are more readily observed and more easily followed. There are, also, many foibles of manner and many refinements of affectation, which sit agreeably upon one man, which if adopted by another would become unpleasant. There are even some excellences of deportment which would not suit another whose character is different. For successful imitation in anything, good sense is indispensable. It is requisite correctly to appreciate the natural differences between your model and yourself, and to introduce such modifications in the copy as may be consistent with it.
Let not any man imagine, that he shall easily acquire these qualities which will constitute him a gentleman. It is necessary not only to exert the highest degree of art, but to attain also that higher accomplishment of concealing art. The serene and elevated dignity which mark that character, are the result of untiring and arduous effort.
The quality which a young man should most affect in intercourse with gentlemen, is a decent modesty: but he must avoid all bashfulness or timidity. His flights must not go too far; but, so far as they go, let them be marked by perfect assurance.
Among persons who are much your seniors behave with the utmost respectful deference. As they find themselves sliding out of importance they may be easily conciliated by a little respect.
By far the most important thing to be attended to, is ease of manner. Grace may be added afterwards, or be omitted altogether: it is of much less moment than is commonly believed. Perfect propriety and entire ease are sufficient qualifications for standing in society, and abundant prerequisites for distinction.
There is the most delicate shade of difference between civility and intrusiveness, familiarity and common-place, pleasantry and sharpness, the natural and the rude, gaiety and carelessness; hence the inconveniences of society, and the errors of its members. To define well in conduct these distinctions, is the great art of a man of the world. It is easy to know what to do; the difficulty is to know what to avoid.
Long usage a sort of moral magnetism, a tact acquired by frequent and long associating with others alone give those qualities which keep one always from error, and entitle him to the name of a thorough gentleman.
A young man upon first entering into society should select those persons who are most celebrated for the propriety and elegance of their manners. He should frequent their company and imitate their conduct. There is a disposition inherent, in all, which has been noticed by Horace and by Dr. Johnson, to imitate faults, because they are more readily observed and more easily followed. There are, also, many foibles of manner and many refinements of affectation, which sit agreeably upon one man, which if adopted by another would become unpleasant. There are even some excellences of deportment which would not suit another whose character is different. For successful imitation in anything, good sense is indispensable. It is requisite correctly to appreciate the natural differences between your model and yourself, and to introduce such modifications in the copy as may be consistent with it.
Let not any man imagine, that he shall easily acquire these qualities which will constitute him a gentleman. It is necessary not only to exert the highest degree of art, but to attain also that higher accomplishment of concealing art. The serene and elevated dignity which mark that character, are the result of untiring and arduous effort.
Related Tags: self development, power, social connexion
John Ugoshowa. For more information about website traffic see the website traffic section of TheFreeAdForum.com directory at:
http://www.thefreeadforum.com/infowizards/SUB/Marketing_32_1.html
Recent articles in this category:
- Dental Insurance For Individual Can Be Of Help At Time
Dental problem may cost one a lot of money and pain. But, practicing a reasonable care could decreas - Personal Trainer For Perfect Health
There is a general misconception that need for a fitness trainer comes for novice or from those who - Varicose Veins - Causes, Symptoms, Treatment
The majority of people after thirty notice the changes that appear with the maturing. In this case t - Scenar Therapy - Self-treatment Or Healing Partnership
Do you want to learn about a device which will help you to ease your pain? If you get this kind of a - Scenar - 5 "no, Nos" Of Scenar
Are you fed up with the pain in your body? Various parts of our body seem to ache due to different r - Scenar Device - 5 Tips On Travelling With Your Scenar (skenar) Device
You might be aware of scenar which has become quite popular these days. This is actually the acronym - Scenar Therapy - How To Treat Your Pet With Scenar
There are many alternative methods of treatment that are being invented these days. Lots of people a - Your Options For The Treatment For Appendicitis
Appendicitis is considered to be a surgical illness. Due to its severe character, the treatment for - How To Choose The Right Copd Medication
Chronic obstructive pulmonary disease or COPD does not have any cure. But with the help of medicines - Septic Arthritis: Infectious Agents Penetrate Joints' Spaces
Another major type of arthritis is septic arthritis, which is also known in various terms like: pyog
Most viewed articles in this category:
- Drugs - the Last Alternative for Adhd in Kids
Anyone over the age of thirty who has grown up with ADHD understands that there was not much help av - Foods To Eat To Gain Weight
Malnutrition has the same degree of problem as obesity. There are people who are too skinny, they fi - Understanding Postpartum Clothing
The same way most pregnant women dream of the day when they will begin showing for wearing maternity - Kegel Exercising for Bladder Control and Enhanced Sexual Pleasure
Kegel exercises strengthen the muscles of the pelvic floor, thereby improving the urethra and/or rec - The Use Of Weight Loss Herbs
Nothing has garnered more attention in today's world than the success or failures of weight loss pro - A Simple Acid Relux Cure
Many people today are afflicted with heartburn. If they eat food that is too spicy, they get heartbu - Five Effective Household Back Pain Treatments
Back pain treatment comes in lots of forms, from exercise to pain mediction. Standard and most wides - Herbal Remedies - Can They Cure What Ails You?
You've probably heard about herbal remedies before and how they can treat a variety of health proble - Natural Relief for Tinnitus - What are your Choices
Natural Relief For Tinnitus - Alternative Options Did you know that there are an estimated 50 t - Birthing Around the World
Since ancestral times, different cultures showed off different customs and beliefs around the miracl