Practice Makes Perfect: Changing Your Communication Habits One Step At a Time
The concept of practice applies to any skill that you want to cultivate. If you take up a new musical instrument, you will need to practice a while before you're ready to give your first concert. In Aikido, the martial art I study and teach, we get on the mat many times each week to practice and perfect our technique.
Improving our communication habits also requires practice. The problem with holding difficult conversations is we often find ourselves in performance mode before we have the chance. It is important to learn the skills of effective communication and to take the time to practice them.
There are many excellent books, teachers, and workshops that will teach the skills, then help you to practice and improve. Seek them out. Make a commitment to read one book or attend a workshop every few months.
You can also learn from your successful conversations as well as the ones that don't turn out as expected. By bringing awareness to what you did well and what you might have done differently, you gradually become more proficient. Here are some ways to bring that awareness to bear in the moment, and to continue to practice communicating more clearly and purposefully:
· Increase Awareness. Notice whether your communication style is accomplishing your goals. If not, try something different.
· Acknowledge. What is your positive hope for the communication? What is theirs? Recognize that you are both doing your best, and give yourself and your partner the benefit of the doubt.
· Keep it safe. Maintain a calm, centered attitude, a respectful demeanor, and a positive purpose.
· Cultivate curiosity. Develop an open, curious, and interested frame of mind. Regardless of what your conversation partner says, try to see their centered intent and respond appropriately.
· Practice, Practice, Practice. Try new techniques and learn from them. If you tend toward a passive and accommodating style, try offering a different opinion on occasion. If the opposite is true and you are on the talkative side, stop yourself and listen more. Ask questions. Try being curious.
A tourist stopped a New Yorker on the street and asked: “How do you get to Carnegie Hall?” The New Yorker replied: “Practice!” An old joke, but a good one. The point is that change takes place gradually over time. Try one adjustment today. Review the suggestions above, and pick one. Let me know what happens. Take time to enjoy your newfound power. And most of all – have fun!
About the Author: Judy Ringer is the author of Unlikely Teachers: Finding the Hidden Gifts in Daily Conflict, containing stories and practices on turning life's challenges into life teachers. Judy is a black belt in aikido and nationally known presenter, specializing in unique workshops on conflict, communication, and creating a more positive work environment. She is the founder of Power & Presence Training, and chief instructor of Portsmouth Aikido, Portsmouth, NH, USA. To sign up for more free tips and articles like these, visit http://www.JudyRinger.com.
Your Article Search Directory : Find in Articles
Recent articles in this category:
- Tips On How To Become A Successful Monavie Distributor
First of all, who is MonaVie, what does it do, and what does it has to offer? MonaVie is an MLM comp - Complete Free Online Surveys And Earn Extra Money During These Tough Times
Times are getting tougher with the economic downturn. The recent credit crunch is one of the most se - Advantage Of Online Paid Background Check Sites
In dealing with somebody, you have to know all-important information about that person. It does not - How To Love Your Job
We spend 60% of our time at work. Many people hate their jobs. Don't be one of them! Use these tips - Domestic Helper Usa Visa: Efficient Ways To Get A Visa
For a U.S.-applying domestic helper, USA Visa is very much necessary. No domestic helper is able to - Magic Shows- Perfect Option At Kid's Party
Magic shows today are increasing in popularity in all party themes such as wedding parties, corporat - Magic Shows-to Add Excitement To Children Entertainment Parties
When it comes to children entertainment parties, there are a plethora of options available, such as - Organizing Magic Live Shows At Kids Parties
If you are going to celebrate your children's birthday party or some private functions that requires - Dare to Challenge FEAR
What does failure have to do with action?I wrote an article on daring to celebrate failure. I - Dare to Elevate Engagement
Did you know: 21% of the global workforce considers themself actively engaged in their work ri
Most viewed articles in this category:
- Common Financial Problems to Avoid
One must first change their habits and not procrastinate. American Consultants Inc at offers key fi - How a Bad Hire Can Hurt Your Business
What's worse - hiring the wrong person or not hiring anyone at all? Companies can become almost des - Joel Comm Is Dr. Adsense
What is Adsense? If you are new to making money online and net marketing, you may not know what Ads - 5 Steps For A Dynamic Wealth System Online
Recipe: Opportunity + knowledge + Dynamic Wealth System + Your Action = Massive Success!!! Step 1 - Membrane Diffuser Solutions for Wastewater Treatment Systems
In the aeration basin of a typical wastewater treatment plant there are both organic and inorganic m - How to Always Pitch A Strike
As business owners, we are always working on new ways to convince people to become customers, client - How To Stop Foreclosure
Losing your house to a foreclosure can be very scary. There are times when circumstances are ou - Dyestuff Industry In India And China
World demand for dyes and organic pigments to touch $10.6 billion in 2008According to a study on dye - Another Year Hating Your Job or Loving Life?
Copyright © 2007 Mary Foley I've come to the conclusion that to be successful - really successf - Cma-cgm Case : the Series of Lawsuits Continues in Syria, Lebanon, Egypt, France, England and the United States
Damietta company case : The series of lawsuits continues in Syria, Lebanon, Egypt, France, England a
